Heeding the call
I’m told that we have some rare energies going on this year and it certainly feels that way, like we’re in some slip stream at the moment, with events unfolding quickly, greater coincidence, synchronicity, stuff happening, mind blowing stuff too, to deepen the faith and belief in the magical and mysterious in this universe.
It can feel like being on a roller coaster at times, an emotional one at that, flung into the darkness of despair and hopelessness, old stuff surfacing and needing clearing but feeling really horrible because of the lower vibration and the stuck-ness of it. But we need to keep moving through it, mustn’t get stuck in the gloom, over-identifying with it, one step at a time, and not jumping to conclusions.
Some will have prepared better than others and will feel fluid and in the flow, and others struggling because there is still work to be done and light to shine brighter into the shadows, still denial and an inability to take responsibility, really we have to now, there is no other way, step up otherwise there will be a rude and shocking awakening instead – we are more than just our body!
In the wider world we are going through the shift too, we are the micro of the macro as you know, and this is a pivotal moment for us as a humanity, Covid and the world’s reaction to this tiny virus has prompted significant change in the way that we are living and our relationship to fear and death and how this is manipulated so easily by the supremacy of western science. There are new worlds waiting to be born but are we ready? Can we allow ourselves the unknown or are we desperate to return to a familiar normal because it is known, even if it is broken?
Many say no. Tens of thousands of people have turned out to marches across Australia in recent days, protesting against the sexual abuse and harassment of women in the country. They were spurred by a recent wave of allegations of sexual assault, centred around Australia's parliament. Some women say that they've been rallying for equality since the 1970s, the 1980s - that they're tired but know how important it is to capture this moment.
This on the back of the “Reclaim our streets” vigil in memory of Sarah Everard grabbing headlines in the UK because of the deeply concerning footage of the police force arresting women. One of those arrested, Patsy Stevenson, whose photograph featured on many newspaper front pages, told Sky News: "I've been thrown into the public eye and the only way I can make this not in vain is to not make it political, not against the police, it's just about the safety of women and we need to talk about it."
There is no doubt that women’s safety is being talked about right now. It’s a theme I explore in my new book, about loss of safety and the impact this has on us, especially where abusive relationships are concerned, let alone not feeling safe in our own environment. You’ll have to wait for the book to read more about that, but I am aware how this undermines our sense of power and worth in this world.
Even here in Guernsey, “Reclaim our streets – Guernsey” is arranging a vigil to raise greater awareness of sexual assault, sexist violence and misogyny on the island. This with the knowledge that Safer, the local domestic abuse charity, has seen a rise in the numbers of victims of domestic abuse seeking help during the pandemic. We had already begun organising a charity event to raise funds for Safer before the second lockdown, and we’re pleased it can still go ahead, because the charity needs the funds and the increased coverage now.
A light has also been shone onto the shadow of racism and race inequality this last year. We’ve known, we’ve all known, but it’s easy to overlook it, ignore it, leave it in the shadow, because what can we do about it? But the pandemic, or the energy that’s been ramping up during the pandemic has shone a light into these shadows, so that we can no longer stay silent, no longer stay in denial, no longer pretend. It’s a big shift for us as a humanity and individually too, because the light’s been shining in and it’s uncomfortable when we see more of the truth.
There’s a lot of anger and we have to be careful that we don’t become more divisive and polarised, when we have the opportunity instead to become more socialised and accepting of diversity. Extreme activism gets us nowhere, it merely feeds the narrative and disempowers us in the process. We have to find another way of being heard and making changes, that does not result in sticking us where we’ve been stuck many times before. At the end of the day WE have to be the change, letting go of our judgments and opinions and healing our wounds, dreaming a new dream.
Many have told me that this second lockdown has been worse than the first. The first woke us up but did we heed the call or did we attempt to go back to sleep again and pretend that as soon as lockdown was over all was well, pottering on with the new normal, ignoring the little voice that has been getting more of our attention during lockdown, that things had to change? The second lockdown came in and if we hadn’t heeded the call then the light shone brighter into the shadows, ouch, and it’s become more difficult to ignore what we know, deep inside us but have been trying to silence, trying to keep hidden because it’s difficult making changes.
Which brings me to the third theme that the pandemic has highlighted – our mental wellbeing. Collectively we’re not well, we know this, we’re living in a way that is not conducive to our mental and emotional wellbeing and the pandemic and lockdown especially, with its removal of our escape routes, has highlighted this. We’ve had to come face to face with ourselves because there has been nowhere to run, no trips, no activities to distract us, an enforced period of time with family or on our own, different to our usual routine, more work, less fun, unless we have made a conscious effort to create balance.
We should be clearer now though, individually and collectively of what needs to change. We can’t pretend anymore, we should no longer ignore the fact that there’s still work to be done, collectively, that there is still deep inequality and patriarchal and colonial conditioning and a lack of taking responsibility for our health and wellbeing. We’re still selling out on what’s truly important, and wondering why we’re still suffering. Now is the time to ask ourselves, how are we choosing to live and love in this world? Are we feeding more of what’s been or are we questioning how it might otherwise be?
As Bayo Akomolafe (Ph.D.) writes on the Embercombe website, “You may have noticed that the ongoing pandemic arrived with more than epidemiological effects. It’s changed everything: what we do when we meet people; how we determine what we need; how we relate to and understand ‘science’ and authorities; how we eat, play, believe, love, and come into touch.
This is because cataclysmic shifts do not just affect the physical world in and around us, they potentially alter the social fabric of our myriad relationships. They disturb the ideas we’ve cherished, and compel new directions… It is about “crisis” (in its archetypal, mythological and historical resonances) and the critical openings presented to us to rework the ways we attend to the world around us. It is about making sanctuary during an earthquake.”
Are you making a sanctuary? Are we collectively achieving this? How can it be different for you, for me, for us all of humanity? I don’t know much but I know that this pandemic has taken me deeper into my own shadows so that I can no longer ignore the changes that have needed to be made, both in relation to self and in relation with others, but without doubt the greatest shift has been in relation to Mother Earth and her sacredness. We are all being called in some way.
The question is, will we answer the call or try to go back to sleep again, to some form of normality, even if it’s broken and no longer working? What changes are you making to promote mental wellbeing, to reduce your suffering? What are you angry about? What needs resolving? What is sacred to you? What new world would you like to create?
Love Emma x
Expectant mums and right to a partner at birth and antenatal appointments in Guernsey
As You’ll know from my previous posts and my letters to the Guernsey Press and there was even a brief moment on Channel TV, I feel passionate about the rights of human beings and especially the rights of pregnant women on Guernsey during lockdown.
In an effort to try to help those women who have had their voice taken away from them through decisions made by the States of Guernsey, it was suggested I write to the CCA. The letter I wrote follows below.
I received a friendly and prompt response from Heidi Soulsby, who I very much respect. She says that she understands my concerns and how it would be the preference to have a companion at the birth of one’s child, but the decision falls under the mandate of HSC as part of its operational decision making, not CCA.
She explained that very difficult decisions are having to be made as the impact of COVID on the hospital is real and can be profound. She stressed that Guernsey only has one hospital and this has already experienced disruption due to a number of staff at all levels having to go into self-isolation - this is not a theoretical issue.
She very kindly offered to forward my letter to Deputy Brouard and ask at the next CCA meeting if he can look at whether anything further can be done to support mothers whilst we are in lockdown in light of the issues I raised.
I am hopeful that with decreasing rates of COVID, some of the stringent rules currently impacting expectant mums will be eased as part of the process of phasing out of lockdown. I do wonder if there is a broader picture here in respect of the need for a shift in perspective on birth generally. Even WHO stresses that a “good birth” does beyond having a healthy baby and stresses that each labour is different and that individualised and supportive care is the key to positive childbirth experience.
“We want women to give birth in a safe environment with skilled birth attendants in well-equipped facilities. However, the increasing medicalization of normal childbirth processes are undermining a woman’s own capability to give birth and negatively impacting her birth experience,” says Dr Princess Nothemba Simelela, WHO Assistant Director-General for Family, Women, Children and Adolescents.
“If labour is progressing normally, and the woman and her baby are in good condition, they do not need to receive additional interventions to accelerate labour,” she says.
The article goes on to say that ‘Childbirth is a normal physiological process that can be accomplished without complications for the majority of women and babies. However, studies show a substantial proportion of healthy pregnant women undergo at least one clinical intervention during labour and birth. They are also often subjected to needless and potentially harmful routine interventions”.https://www.who.int/mediacentre/news/releases/2018/positive-childbirth-experience/en/
The need for intervention will likely only increase with the stress that expectant mums are under here in Guernsey especially now during lockdown but also with the medicalised approach to birth that we see here with the maternity services being located within the hospital.
Anything any of us can do to help raise awareness and keep the conversation open, with the hope of changing local attitudes towards birth (that it doesn’t need to be a clinical experience) and ensures that expectant mums and their partners have a voice and are empowered and feel safe to use it - can only be a positive thing for human rights generally.
….
Dear members of the CCA
Expectant mums and right to a partner at birth and antenatal appointments.
I am writing to express my concern that expectant mums are still being denied the opportunity to be accompanied into theatre with a birth partner when requiring a Caesarean Section, and that expectant mums are also still denied the opportunity to take a partner with them to their antenatal scans.
Expectant mum and birth partner during Caesarean Section
The World Health Organisation (“WHO”) strongly recommend supporting women to have a chosen companion during labour and childbirth, including during Covid-19: “When a woman has access to trusted emotional, psychological and practical support during labour and childbirth, evidence shows that both her experience of childbirth and her health outcomes can improve. In Companion of choice during labour and childbirth for improved quality of care, WHO and HRP present updated information on the benefits of labour companionship for women and their newborns, and how it can be implemented as part of efforts to improve quality of maternity care.
The current COVID-19 pandemic is no exception.
WHO Clinical management of COVID-19: interim guidance strongly recommends that all pregnant women, including those with suspected, probable or confirmed COVID-19, have access to a companion of choice during labour and childbirth.
Again and again, research shows, that women greatly value and benefit from the presence of someone they trust during labour and childbirth. A companion of choice can give support in practical and emotional ways.
They can bridge communication gaps between a woman in labour and the healthcare workers around her, offer massage or hand-holding to help relieve pain, and provide reassurance to help her feel in control. As an advocate, a labour companion can witness and safeguard against mistreatment or neglect.
The benefits of labour companionship can also include shorter length of time in labour, decreased caesarean section and more positive health indicators for babies in the first five minutes after birth.”
Please see this link to the full article, https://www.who.int/news/item/09-09-2020-every-woman-s-right-to-a-companion-of-choice-during-childbirth
Furthermore, and as you will know, human rights require public bodies to treat people with dignity and respect and to consult them about decisions and respecting their choices. Human rights law give expectant mums the right to receive maternity care, to make their own choices about their care and to be given standards of care that respect their dignity and autonomy as human beings.
The Human Rights (Bailiwick of Guernsey) Law came into effect on 1st September 2006.The law incorporates the provisions set out in the European Convention on Human Rights into Bailiwick law. It also makes it unlawful for a public authority to act in a way which clashes with those provisions. The law ensures that everyone in the Bailiwick is entitled to the fundamental rights and freedoms of the European Convention on Human Rights.
The fundamental human rights values of dignity, autonomy and equality are often relevant to the way a woman is treated during pregnancy and childbirth. Failure to provide adequate maternity care, lack of respect for women’s dignity, invasions of privacy, procedures carried out without consent, failure to provide adequate pain relief without medical contraindication, and lack of respect for women’s choices about where and how a birth takes place, may all violate human rights and can lead to women feeling degraded and dehumanised.
Article 8 of the European Convention guarantees the right to private life, which the courts have interpreted to include the right to physical autonomy and integrity. The European Court of Human Rights has held that the right to private life includes a right for women to make choices about the circumstances in which they give birth. The separation of either parent from their newly born child also constitutes an interference with their (and their child’s) rights under this article 8 of the European Convention on Human Rights.
Birthrights, a UK based organisation, protecting human rights in childbirth published legal advice on 12 February 2021, which states that, “The separation of either parent from their newly born child constitutes an interference with their (and their child’s) rights under article 8 of the European Convention on Human Rights. The circumstances of giving birth also engage the rights of the parents and the child under article 8.4. It is therefore wrong in law to suggest that “legislation” requires all parents who test positive for COVID-19 to self-isolate at all times. Being present during childbirth and at the neonatal stage may be necessary for the purposes of “medical assistance” or it may be necessary, depending on the facts of an individual case, to facilitate the exercise of article 8 rights.” JUDE BUNTING DANIEL CLARKE Doughty Street Chambers 29th January 2021.
You can view the letter here: https://www.birthrights.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2021/02/Note-on-lawfulness-of-NHSE-Guidance-sent-to-client-09.02.2021.pdf
The WHO believes “high quality care” should encompass both service delivery and the woman’s experience: “Our new recommendations on intrapartum care set the global standard on the provision and experience of care during birth. The guidelines place the woman and her baby at the centre of the care model, to achieve the best possible physical, emotional and psychological outcomes.
Critical components of a woman-centred approach include: avoiding unnecessary medical interventions, encouraging women to move around freely during early labour, allowing them to choose their birth position and have a companion of their choice by their side. It also means ensuring privacy and confidentially and providing adequate information about pain relief.”
See more here, https://www.who.int/mediacentre/commentaries/2018/having-a-healthy-baby/en/
It shouldn’t even be a matter of law or human rights or the WHO’s guidance on childbirth, it should be a matter of compassion and respect. Any woman who has experienced Caesarean Section will know how important it is to have a birth companion present. I have experienced two Caesarean Sections, one planned due to pregnancy complications and another emergency, due to early rupture of waters and perceived risk of infection.
Like many, my partner and I conceived through IVF, suffering loss in the process. We also experienced the trauma of early pregnancy bleeding and pregnancy complications so that by the time of the birth, we had been on a stressful and traumatic journey to parenthood together and we were keen to see that through to fruition together. We are not unlike many other couples, the journey to conception can be challenging, and there are often losses and complications along the way.
Birth is also not without its challenges, not least because of inherent fear of stillbirth but because of the current-medicalised nature of birth and the fear that accompanies a clinical hospital environment. During my first pregnancy, due to complications with the placenta, there was a risk that I would require a general anaesthetic. This notion caused me to feel extremely stressed because both my partner and I wanted to be present at the birth of our firstborn and be a family together - finally.
Fortunately a general anaesthetic was not required but I spent the first part of the procedure shaking uncontrollably (and yet trying to keep still for the spinal block), surrounded by people I didn’t know, in a clinical theatre that I had never seen before, with bright lights and noise, wearing only a thin hospital gown to protect what was left of my modesty. This was not the environment that I had wanted for birth.
I cannot express the relief I felt when my partner was finally admitted to theatre and stood beside me holding my shaking hand. He was not only a source of much comfort as my baby was essentially cut from me, but he was able to reveal the sex and be part of the ‘birthing process’, an experience neither of us will ever forget – we have the photos if we do, because we were permitted an iPad in theatre. He was also able to hold his son while my low blood pressure was stabilised, and be with me for the duration of time spent in recovery.
To have expected me to do this on my own, and denied my partner the right to be with us as a family and welcome his son into the world would have been cruel and unforgivable. Yet here in Guernsey we are expecting women to do this during the stress of lockdown too.
The strict new rules that have been implemented at the PEH further compound this, which will undoubtably cause more women to require medical intervention than may otherwise have been necessary, resulting in a higher incidence of Caesarean section and more partners missing the birth of their babies.
Surely birth partners in full PPE, having taken a Covid test every 96 hours prior to birth, and self-isolated, should pose no greater risk than theatre staff and midwives who are not subject to the self-isolation rules prior to birth. Further, the argument that theatre staff shouldn’t be burdened with caring for a partner is nonsense; they do this ordinarily (together with a midwife and the kindness of the anaesthetist in my case) so what difference does it make now.
There is a thin line between protecting the vulnerable and creating greater vulnerability. In the CCA’s effort to protect the elderly and most vulnerable from death through COVID-19 and to ensure that the medical services are not overrun, CCA is overlooking the vulnerability of expectant mums and the increased risk of birth trauma and resulting impact on mother, partner and baby post-partum, leading to mental, emotional and psychological issues at a later date. This is not a time to be ‘selling out’ on the next generation.
Taking a partner to an antenatal scan
I am also concerned that the current strict rules in place in the maternity unit resulting in expectant mums not able to take partners with them for antenatal scans are infringing on their rights.
Albeit in the UK, Birthrights has received legal advice stating that maternity services which prevent partners from attending scans, and don’t allow partners to be involved in the appointment remotely, may be acting unlawfully and unreasonably.
This legal advice prepared by Shu Shin Luh of Doughty Street Chambers with support from Irwin Mitchell concludes that “a blanket prohibition on the use of streaming or recording during antenatal appointments in circumstances where the support partner is unable to attend in-person with a pregnant woman is likely to be unlawful, discriminatory and violate both Articles 8 and 14 of the European Convention on Human Rights.”
It makes clear that “there is a well-established body of clinical evidence showing that partner participation in antenatal appointments and through a woman’s pregnancy improves maternal and foetal health.”
The advice mentions that there is compelling evidence that having a support partner present at antenatal appointments improves maternal and foetal outcomes for pregnant women, a finding backed by clinical studies and by the WHO, even in the context of the pandemic; and evidence of potential harm and risk of harm to pregnant women and their families of not facilitating partner participation at important clinical junctures of a woman’s pregnancy journey.
Furthermore, the advice stipulates that, “the outright refusal to make arrangements to enable pregnant women to involve their partners in the antenatal appointments, either by streaming or recording the appointments would, in my view, engage Article 8 of the European Convention on Human Rights (“ECHR”) and the right to of both parents’ to their private and family life. It is my view that it will be difficult to identify any clear or proportionate justification for taking such extreme measures, particularly given strong policy reasons for encouraging and facilitating partner attendance as clinically beneficial to maternal and foetal health.” SHU SHIN LUH Doughty Street Chambers, 21 January 2021.
You can read the full advice here https://www.birthrights.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/210114-Birthrights.Advice-filming-at-scans.pdf and the article from Birthright here https://www.birthrights.org.uk/2021/01/31/partners-should-be-able-to-join-maternity-scans-remotely-say-lawyers/.
Again, perhaps it’s not until you have been an expectant mum attending a scan with a history of fertility and pregnancy complications that you appreciate the need for a partner to be present.
Having experienced early pregnancy bleeding, I was extremely nervous attending the 12 weeks scans during both pregnancies, this after early pregnancy scans to confirm IVF pregnancy and continuation of pregnancy despite bleeding. There is a degree of ‘not being able to rest easily’ until passing 12-week scan threshold, when rates of miscarriage decrease, and expectant mums feel at greater ease of revealing the pregnancy publicly.
The 20-week scan was equally as nerve racking if not more so, because at this scan the foetus is checked for visible abnormality. The sex of the foetus can also be revealed. It was at this scan that a problem with the placenta was identified and this required a transvaginal ultrasound, where a probe was inserted into the body. Regardless of any previous sexual trauma, it can be a stressful experience and I would have felt desperately uncomfortable having this transvaginal scan conducted without my partner being present in the room with me.
Not only that but many women have suffered miscarriage and are highly stressed ahead of any scan. My friend who is 20-weeks pregnant attended a scan on her own here in Guernsey last week, this after attending a 12-week scan during her first pregnancy and discovering that there was no heartbeat. To have expected her to attend a 20-week scan on her own, without her partner, to check for birth abnormalities, after having suffered a miscarriage during her first pregnancy and this revealed to her at a scan is inherently cruel.
She asked the sonographer if she could take a video for her partner, this being their first baby together and possibly their only child, but this was denied. A question was raised in Monday’s States briefing about the reason women cannot take videos of scans to share with their partners but this went unanswered. I suspect it is to do with litigation, but this should not prevent the live streaming of scans to partners at home.
Deputy Al Brouard is quoted in the Guernsey Press on Monday 15th February 2021 as saying: “They (the medical staff) are 100% committed to helping women and families have the best birthing experience possible, whatever the circumstances”. I don’t agree with him and I am both ashamed with, and disappointed, at the States of Guernsey and their decision to deny women the opportunity to take a partner with them during Caesarean Section and antenatal scan.
I believe that the States of Guernsey has a moral obligation as much as a legal duty, to show greater compassion towards the rights of women, men and families when it comes to medical care during pregnancy and birth regardless of Covid-19 and lockdown. I hope that you will reconsider the current rules and extend an apology to those women, men and families who have been denied the best birthing experience possible during lockdown on Guernsey.
Many thanks and best wishes
Emma
Cleaning the planet!
There’s a lot of media coverage of beach cleaning at the moment, which is a positive thing, because it raises awareness of the need to keep our beaches clean. But as with all these things, i do wonder if we get start to get lost in the glory of it, so it’s not so much about cleaning the beach, but about being seen cleaning the beaches.
We clean the beach daily, I enjoy it, it’s something I’ve popped on my CV because I find it like a meditation, and I’m always fascinated to see what i might find. I’m telling you now, not for the glory, but because it’s a simple pastime that can easily be incorporated into any trip to the beach, just take a plastic bag along with you and some rubber gloves and go have a rummage in the shore line and see what you may find!
I don’t know what it is these days, that we need to make such a big deal about these things, is it our inherent insecurity and our need to be recognised for our goodness? Or is it simply the effect of social media where everyone is trying to be recognised for something? Well whatever it is, if it gets people cleaning the beaches, that has to be a good thing, but let’s do it for the rights reasons.
What you’ll find is the beach gives back to you enough and more, beautiful moments of being at one with nature, the sea, the sand, the skies, all creating a positive impact on the soul. There might be little gifts too, we found a heart shaped sponge awaiting us yesterday, for example, and there are sometimes marbles, or sea glass.
I can’t help thinking that as with any litter picking, the more we collect litter, cleaning up our beautiful planet, the more we’ll find ourselves collecting the litter from our own lives, cleaning ourselves up in the process, appreciating more of the simplicity of life and the inter-connected nature of all life too. It becomes not just about beach cleaning then, but about cleaning the planet generally.
So the message is clear, collect litter, from the side of the road, from the beach, from wherever you happen to find any, and then go about your life.
Happy collecting!
Love Emma x
Freedom of choice for birth in Guernsey
In Guernsey, during lockdown, pregnant women are now denied the opportunity to take a birthing partner with them when they go to theatre for a Caesarean -Section. To me this is inherently cruel and has elements of patriarchy about it.
Having had two Caesarean Sections myself I am very aware that the experience can be extremely scary and traumatic. My first pregnancy brought with it complications, which meant I had to have a planned Caesarean Section. I was told repeatedly that due to the complications there was a risk that I might require a general anaesthetic resulting in neither E or I witnessing the birth of our baby.
This troubled me endlessly, and when it came to being administered the spinal block I was shaking with fear and had to make a real effort to keep myself still. I cannot tell you the relief when E appeared in theatre, not least to hold my hand and give me strength while the procedure was taking place, and to reveal the sex of our son, but in recovery afterwards when my blood pressure was unstable and of which I now have very little memory.
My second Caesarean Section was less stressful and much more of the spiritual experience that I had hoped birth might be. Dr Uma Dinsmore-Tuli in her amazing book Yoni Shakti talks about birth as being the principle siddhi, or magical power, that allows the greatest spiritual transformation of all the siddhis, including menstruation, miscarriage, lactation etc if the women is conscious to it.
Accessing the spiritually transformative experience of birth was extremely important to me. I wanted to be conscious of the process, less restricted by fear, as I had been during my first birth experience. I had hoped for a home birth where I might have been able to drop into the space of birth more easily, but this was not my path and I ended up with an emergency Caesarean Section, six weeks earlier than my son’s due date due, due to my waters breaking early. You can read all about this in Dancing with the Moon.
It was still a profound spiritual experience for me as I surrendered to it in a way that I had not been able to do during the birth of my eldest son. It helped enormously to me that E was able to join me in theatre and that I did not have to experience the fear that I had felt during the first Caesarean Section, in that he might not be able to join me. I was able to approach theatre in a far calmer and more peaceful state of mind.
Now, here in Guernsey, because of the alleged additional risk of COVID, birthing partners are no longer able to accompany their birthing mums to theatre. This sounds like a fundamental loss of human right for women to choose who they might have with them at what might well be a decisive turning point in their life. For first time mum’s this is a life changing event, as they transition from maiden to motherhood and absolutely they should be supported during this emotionally charged time by partners if they choose.
To me, this loss of choice, overlooks and dismisses the emotional, mental and spiritual needs of women, denoting the birth experience to nothing more than a surgical procedure. It also disempowers women and removes their voice. I know that many have complained and attempted to find a solution but they are repeatedly told that this is the way, that there is no other option available to them.
Pregnant women are in a vulnerable position throughout their pregnancy, continuously reminded by the medical profession of the inherent risks of both pregnancy and birth to the extent that they can then be easily manipulated and controlled through fear. In the process this denies them their own wisdom, which is potentially much easier to access than it might usually be because of the inherent spiritual experience of pregnancy and birth.
The medical-decided risk of pregnancy and birth is evaluated in a way that overlooks this spiritual wisdom, and the mental and emotional needs of women. I totally appreciate that the outcome of a healthy birthed baby is essential, but at what cost to women? In Guernsey we seem hell bent on controlling through fear, which has elements of patriarchy to it, men, generally, making decisions about women’s lives and making them powerfulness to it.
A letter I wrote about this was published in the Guernsey Press on Saturday 6 February, and the very next day an article appeared on The States of Guernsey website entitled “First-time mum that [sic] underwent C-Section during lockdown is aiming to reassure expectant parents”. I cannot claim that this arose as a result of my letter, as I know this is a hot topic on social media and the States have been sent a number of letters and requests for a change of stance on Caesarean Section protocol during lockdown, but I was humoured by the timing.
I was concerned too, that the States felt the need to try to reassure parents, knowing full well that their decision has not been taken lightly by those affected. And they will be affected. What women do not need as they approach birth is any additional stress and emotional strain, for this will likely impact on their ability to birth vaginally and result in the one thing they will be keen to avoid, namely a Caesearn Section under lockdown.
There are broader issues here though, around human rights. During childbirth, every woman has a right to:
· safe and appropriate maternity care that respects her dignity;
· privacy and confidentiality;
· make choices about her own pregnancy and childbirth;
· equality and freedom from discrimination.
Can the States of Guernsey honestly say that they are allowing expectant mum’s their own choice about how she births during lockdown?
In the article on the States of Guernsey website, Head of Maternity and Paediatrics, Annabel Nicholas, is quoted as saying, “We are so passionate about women and families having the best experience they can, whatever the circumstances”. This, after new mum, Mrs Cornes, is quoted as saying, “Any emergency and any unplanned C-section is scary, but it was even more so because of COVID. At 12am when I was being wheeled down both Jake and I were crying…”. Is this really an example of the States of Guernsey offering women and families the best birth experience they can, whatever the circumstances? Is this allowing expectant mum’s their own choice?
As written in my second letter to the States of Guernsey, I’m both disappointed with, and ashamed at, their decision to once again overlook the mental, emotional and spiritual needs of birthing women, let alone their birthing partners. We’re told repeatedly that the decision has been made for safety reasons and yet given that we now have thorough and rigorous testing facilities in place, it seems crazy that this cannot be extended to birthing partners to enable them to support expectant mums at a crucial and life changing time.
Surely if expectant mum and birthing partner self-isolate prior to the birth and are tested frequently, there should be no reason why the partner, in full PPE, should be any greater risk than one of the theatre staff. This overzealous decision to separate birthing mums from their birth partners in theatre is inherently cruel and I hope those in ‘power’ come to their senses soon.
And really that’s the crux of the matter, this question over power, that weaves it’s way, even now, through our lives as women living in the 21st century. There are much broader issues at play, not only human rights and the fear and risk-based nature of allopathic care, reducing birth to nothing more than a surgical procedure, but what it means to be a women, and the choices available to us in relation to our body and our experience of these deeply feminine and life changing moments of our life.
All women should have a human right to be accompanied by their choice in birthing partner at the birth of their baby and Guernsey needs to wake up and start giving pregnant women a little more respect, empowering her, not taking her power away, regardless of the external circumstances and the state of the world at that time.
**Those of you in Guernsey who feel a similar way, it would be wonderful if you would find them courage to give voice to this, either by writing to your local deputy, the States of Guernsey and/or the Guernsey Press. Also sharing on social media. Women need to reclaim their voice and be given back their right to choice.
Why are we always at war?
Maybe it’s already been discussed on social media, but is it any coincidence that as we declare war on a virus, ‘our enemy’, the fashion industry is awash with camo print this season?! Why do we always have to be at war with something?
I saw on the news today that people are going to be asked to “step forward for your country” in terms of getting the vaccine. I mean seriously, if ever we think we’re at war then it’s comments like that. I’m not anti the vaccine by the way, or pro it for that matter, everyone should have the right to choose according to their perspective, situation and families. But I do wish we’d stop this war talk and look deeper, at the reason we’re getting these super killing viruses in the first place.
Furthermore, I really wish, for the sake of my children and their children, that we’d stop focusing on the quick fix and look at the bigger picture, how we’re living, and how we’re living in relationship with our own nature and nature generally. It seems so blindingly obvious to me. Yet here we have 70 million Americans voting for a man who doesn’t even believe in climate change, let alone equality for all regardless of race or gender.
We could easily get really depressed about the state of the world at the moment, all the actual wars as people kill one another in the name of religion, or some sort of power base, whatever it is, crazy. Krishnamurti was right when he said:
“We human beings are what we have been for millions of years - colossally greedy, envious, aggressive, jealous, anxious and despairing, with occasional flashes of joy and affection. We are a strange mixture of hate and gentleness; we are both violence and peace. There has been outward progress from the bullock cart to the jet plane, but psychologically, the individual has not changed at all, and the structure of society throughout the world has been created by individuals. The outward social structure is the result of inward psychological structure of our human relationships, for the individual is the result of the total experience, knowledge and conduct of man. Each one of us is a storehouse of all the past. The individual is the human who is all mankind. The whole history of man is written in ourselves”.
It can only ever change with each of us, but we’re often at war within ourselves, not at peace with who we are and/or our purpose on planet earth. We fight with those we love, take our crap out on those we don’t, and wonder why we suffer the way we do. The only way we’ll change the world is by changing ourselves, taking responsibility for our health and wellbeing, our state of mind, our level of consciousness then, and our resulting experience of life, determined as it by the state of our mind.
But of course, so many don’t make any effort to know more of themselves, to understand the nature of their mind and the manner in which their mind impacts on the collective consciousness of life lived here on planet earth, how the lack of delving in the shadows, the lack of fundamental change, of increasing consciousness by waking up to our true selves (beyond the illusion of this material world), means that we just keep getting more of the same, albeit packaged differently, because we are continuously reinventing the wheel.
As Krishnamurti said: “…in order to understand ourselves we need a great deal of humility… But how can we be free to look and learn when our minds, from the moment we are born to the moment we die, are shaped by a particular culture in the narrow pattern of the ‘me’? For centuries, we have been conditioned by nationality, caste, class, tradition, religion, language, education, literature, art, custom, convention, propaganda of all kinds, economic pressure, the food we eat, the climate we live in, our family, our friends, our experiences - every influence you can think of - and therefore our responses to every problem are conditioned.”
So it is that when we feel threatened as a society by something, be that another religion or a virus, we declare war on it! This is the conditioned response. If only we could get out of our minds and find a different way to live, that doesn’t respond to conditioning, to what has happened previously, to always having to find a way to harm and limit the possibility for peace.
The way we live is harmful! This is really at the crux of it. Life is being lived too quickly, frenetically, and we are expected to keep up, even though it is not in our nature, not fundamentally, to live at this pace. Increasing numbers of people are suffering mentally with depression and anxiety rates on the rise, let alone stress and the resulting loss of life through heart conditions and cancers, as our hearts give up under the weight of all the tension, and our cells are the battleground for all the inner tension.
This from trying to live in a way that isn’t harmonious with the very core of our being, and within us all this dis-resonance, being one person at work, another person at home, another person with friends and another with our children, never truly knowing who we are deep on the inside beyond the titles, labels and names we give ourselves, beyond all the outward stuff to try to prove who we are - that we are someone - in this world.
So we roll out our mat and we practice, and we look inside, beyond the superficial, to deeper parts of us that we ignore, to those muscles that we never use, or need to connect into, because some of the larger muscles take over the path of least resistance, repeating more of what has been, depending grooves that now need to change, awakening to unhelpful movement patterns in the body and the underlying emotional and mental imprinting, the stuff that doesn’t need to be there anymore, that weighs us down, keeps us stuck, keeps us limited, keeps us being at war within ourselves.
The wonderful thing about yoga is that it doesn’t ask much of you, just to turn up and keep turning up, that’s all. Yoga weaves magic into our lives, we breathe, we move with awareness, we rest, we sit in silence and observe, it doesn’t need expensive clothes, an all-singing, all dancing mat, it doesn’t need our titles and our labels and our stories and narratives, it just needs our attention, our awareness, and it is this that will help to wake up, help us make peace with ourselves and be at peace within ourselves.
The world needs us to wake up. Not more war. We’re done with war. There has to be another way and I’m hopeful the next generation will be more awake than us and usher in the change we need on planet earth. But we need to lay the pathways for them, do the work on ourselves, encourage greater inner resolution and peace, greater responsibility for our experience of life lived so that we positively influence them.
This because when we resolve dis-resonance in ourselves, then it is resolved in them too energetically and so we clear it from the line, shift the consciousness filtering through, positively affect intergenerational patterns, so that we literally change the course of our family line…we stop passing our crap (inherited from our parents and their parents, all the conditioning from eons ago) through to the next generation…It’s our duty then.
But more on that another time!
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