Retreating in Goa at the beautiful Satsanga!

Wow, we've just returned from an amazing adventure to India, beginning with a fabulous yoga retreat at the beautiful Satsanga retreat Centre in Goa.  

I know I'm biased as I was leading the retreat, but it was a fabulous retreat with an amazing bunch of lovely ladies with beautiful souls who called themselves "the Marigolds", and with good reason too as they shone as brightly as this sunny flower.

Satsanga is yoga heaven for me, a paradise then, where you're safely held within a space of love, care and kindness.  It's really like nothing else.  The staff are amazingly friendly and helpful, always smiling and keen to do all they can to make you feel at ease and able to enjoy your retreat.  

The owners Emma and Olaf are beautiful souls too and my eldest, Elijah, loved playing with their eldest, Lomax, and one of the local boys, Rihad, It was a joy to see, happy in each other's company. In years to come my youngest, Eben, will no doubt forge a friendship with their youngest, Leo too.

It's the family aspect that makes this retreat centre so welcoming. It's real life lived in a spiritual context, with tractors and diggers, but also the most beautiful yoga space.  You can even drink wine by the glass with your meal, which is refreshing from the olden days where wine and yoga were never encouraged to mix. It's all about balance after all.

The yoga studio is incredible and I am pining for it now!  It's got it's own uplifting energy, containing the vibration of all that practice, which has taken place in there over the last ten years. There's a huge statue to Shiva too, and this has no doubt had an impact on our experiences in the yoga studio and beyond. Bringing Shiva into our lives is to be welcomed, but he likes to destroy...so that we can recreate...

We practiced four hours of yoga every day except for one day where we enjoyed a break in the afternoon and the ladies made the most of the opportunity to go and watch the sunsetting from the beach. The classes whizzed by, and we covered an awful lot of ground, and with it being such a beautifully intimate group, everyone was able to advance their practice somehow.

For some this meant learning how to practice a headstand or a handstand, for others it was more about the other aspects of yoga, so perhaps chanting Bija mantra for the first time, or Kirtan, or embracing the diversity of breathing exercises and gaining an understanding of how they change the way we feel, or perhaps the opportunity for a yoga nidra every day, and using props in a way that we don't do in Guernsey due to lack of yoga studio space.

Each morning began at 7.30am with a two hour asana practice, each day having a different theme, maybe one day we looked at fear and how that showed up in our practise and maybe another looked at love, or clarity, or whatever it may be.  We practiced as many different postures as possible, sometimes using the wall for alignment awareness, and sometimes flowing, and being encouraged to adapt as necessary to allow for any body issues arising during the week.  This class always finished with a relaxation and me channelling Reiki to everyone in turn.

After class we enjoyed a scrummy breakfast. There were bowls and bowls of freshly cut fruit, homemade gluten free granola, homemade peanut butter, a plethora of breads, and a hot Indian dish. We were spoilt for choice and Ewan and I always washed this down with homemade chai made with homemade coconut milk.  Bliss! 

Free time followed, perhaps a swim in the beautifully deep, long and refreshing pool, a lie on a sun lounger in the peaceful space protected from the rest of the world, with beautiful pink flowers and occasionally a sighting of a monkey swinging in the trees, and the dragon flies which are abundant here, or maybe a treatment with the Ayurvedic ladies. 

Lunch was at 1.30pm and was a help-yourself affair, perhaps a vegetarian or vegan curry, with rice and a salad, or there was humous one day with falafels.  All the food is made from scratch using the finest ingredients sourced locally as much as possible.  The head chef, Hannah, is incredibly knowledgeable about the healing power of food, she also a trained nutritional consultant and most of the ladies saw her for this service on a one-to-one basis  and said she was incredibly intuitive and helpful

The afternoon was again at your leisure, before the class at 4.30pm.  Often Ewan, the boys and I would disappear after breakfast and head to the beach in a taxi.  However if Eben decided to nap, we'd go late morning instead, skipping lunch. It was very easy to get out and about. Satsanga provide a list of mobile numbers for their pool of local taxi drivers from the village, and there's even a free phone to use. 

We happened upon Isaac on our first outing and he became our taxi driver for the whole week.  It'd take him ten minutes to arrive from calling him, and he was always available for us. Sometimes we'd venture to one of the closer beaches such as Anjuna (15 minutes away by car), although I preferred it when we ventured further up the coast to Mandrem (35-40 minutes by car), as the beaches were cleaner.

We're spoilt for beaches in Guernsey and I certainly wouldn't go to this area of Goa just for their beaches.  The popular ones like Anjuna were dirty, and we quickly learned the best areas to go along this stretch to avoid glass on the sand and rubbish in the shallows. This was probably more of a concern to us than for most, simply because we had the children and Elijah likes to run around.

The beaches farther away like Mandrem were clean, and they had better shore break which made for lots of fun with Elijah in the water.  Furthermore they're quieter without the loud disco music so we'd get a couple of sun beds in the shade and Ewan would sit with Eben while Elijah and I played in the sea.  It's sun bed service here and lemon soda quickly became the perfect refreshing Goa drink for us!

We were generally the only ones going to the beach as the ladies preferred to stay by the pool, swimming, reading books, chatting, and enjoying treatments with the Ayurvedic-qualified girls.  I went for a few Shirodhana sessions where warm oil is poured over the forehead and third eye and found this deeply relaxing. The ladies also arranged sessions with the Ayurvedic doctor and with Hannah.  They popped out for shopping purposes but they were all happy to chill out as much as possible.

The afternoon yoga class was a relaxed affair, including pranayama, meditation and a yoga nidra. Sometimes there was some gentle movement, other times restorative yoga, sometimes Bhakti yoga with some singing, and other times the chanting of Bija mantra, and then the use of mudra. It was certainly the more introspective part of the day and also an opportunity to truly tap into the energy of the practice beyond the asana and see how that made us feel.

Dinner followed at 7pm, and we were again spoilt. All of the local ladies who assist in the kitchen are very skilled in producing quality home-cooked Indian vegan and vegetarian food and they catered superbly for all our dietary requirements.  There were yummy Indian curries and one time we had Burmese and another Thai, and on the final night it was Friday pizza night using the proper pizza oven that Emma and Olaf have recently installed, and a Spanish friend who used to run his own pizza place back home in Barcelona was on hand with the cooking.

Many times I thought we'd died and gone to heaven.  If it wasn't the meals it was the snacks, the raw cacao balls were amazing, and then the homemade juices and smoothies which you could order throughout the day, the yoga studio and the pool, and the rooms which were spacious, at least for us, and the fans that helped to keep us cool.

One night I arranged for Emma's teacher, Om, to come and lead a kirtan session.  It was a hilarious hour as we tried to tune into his wife's pitch and chanted the Hare Krishna mantra at some pace.  None of us dared to look at another for fear of giving rise to the giggling we felt was near! Om and his wife brought their daughter with them and they were so lovely in there sharing, it was a fab night!

Another night Emma arranged for one of her friends, an Italian lady called Chiara to come and share a very ancient, deep and dynamic style of singing called Dhrupad with us. Dhrupad is the mother of all hindustani music evoking the ancient veda and more ancient nada yoga chanting. It was amazing, you could really feel the essence of this ancient mystical music and Chiara was so passionate and inspiring in her sharing. 

It was a Taurus full moon the last day of the retreat so the night beforehand we Marigolds swam in the pool with the moon shining brightly ahead and howled up at it for holding us so safely over the week. This was a lovely way to spend our last evening together! 

The retreat finished after breakfast on the Saturday and we all felt heavy hearted saying goodbye.  Some were headed directly home and others, like us, onwards to other parts of India.

Ewan, the boys, Vicki and I flew up to Delhi and took the train the next day to Agra to see the Taj Mahal, before taking a train back to Delhi and visiting the Red Fort. It was a crazy few days after the peace and calm of Satsanga and  I wouldn't do this again!

I'm already looking at dates to return to Satsanga and would go back next week if I could.  It truly is one of those magical gems that you find from time to time during your life and I'm grateful it's been in mine!

Thank you to all of you at Satsanga and to you beautiful Marigold ladies, and of course to Vicki for being child-helper extraordinaire on our adventures to Delhi and beyond. 

x

Namaste from incredible India!

We made it here in one piece, children and all, and are now on retreat at the beautifully peaceful Satsanga Retreat Centre in Goa. Here we're nourishing our souls and revitalising and rejuvenating our bodies and minds at the same time.

It’s a joy to practice yoga in the Shiva shala, swim in the refreshing pool, eat the most delicious vegetarian food (the raw cacao balls and masala chai with fresh coconut milk are especially divine), and be treated with such kindness and attentiveness by our Indian friends. 

We’ve been enjoying trips to the beaches and the markets and getting out of the comfort zone and experiencing a different pace of life. This is a fabulous place to retreat – my idea of yoga heaven!

Love and light.

x

This Motherhood Malarkey!

Wow, it's hard to believe that my youngest, Eben, turned one today.  That was some year and some introduction to son number two with him arriving six weeks early, my water's breaking on the super full moon half way through a yoga retreat I was running in Herm...

...a year on and my poor little man was sick on the October Herm retreat, which brought with it its challenges.  I was a little bit sick too, a combination of pre-school bugs, sleep deprivation and Reiki healing.

All in all this set things up for a fairly rocky road this last week with the new moon energy building and definitely encouraging a huge letting go, bringing us to our knees...or in my case onto my back on the road at Petit Bot, in despair, tears flowing, feeling deserted by my guardian angels and all the strength and support of the Universe.  My lying on my back was me trying to ground. And because I was just too tired to keep going a moment longer.

I thought I'd got it out my system but back at home, and preparing for the first birthday party I had a message to call the bank.  There followed a frustrating 40 minute experience, which found me crying, yes crying, on the phone to the second person I spoke to when I failed the security test and he told me I'd need to phone back.  "but do you not realise I have a birthday cake to make and a party to run in 20 minutes", I sobbed in despair.  "Madam, I'm very sorry but you will need to telephone again, you've failed security".

So I telephoned again, trying to compose myself and lo and behold it turns out I was talking to the business people and needed to be speaking to the personal client people, so it's not surprising I failed the test, and so more waiting, me in tears, my Mum arrived and gave me a much needed hug, stress levels going into overdrive and finally I spoke to the fourth person and issue resolved.  

So suffice it to say that today I conclude that this this motherhood malarkey is exhausting. It's not just the sleep deprivation but the endless concern and, hmmm, dare I say worry.  Yes I know I know, I'm a Reiki teacher and practitioner and one of the Reiki principles is "for today, do not worry", because as we all know worrying just wastes energy and changes nothing...other than your stress levels and facial lines. But it's difficult not to worry sometimes.

This week Elijah's been testing because Eben's been ill with an ear infection was it happens.  So this meant he had to have antibiotics, which go against everything I stand up against...I've spent a year trying to heal his gut from the antibiotics he was prescribed at birth and now here a year on, another dose, and all because we're flying tomorrow and we couldn't risk the infection getting worse.  As it was he was hitting his head and rubbing his ears and vomiting with the coughing.

Then because Eben's been poorly and clinging to my waist or my breasts, well suckling from my breasts, but you know what I mean, Elijah's been even more challenging than usual because he wants attention.  He also loathes preschool, or at least he loathes the idea of it so that's got me thinking...and pondering...because another thing I'm passionate about is education, and not education like we currently know it, at least not here in the UK.

And then of course the packing for India.  Okay the list could go on.  I feel much calmer now. Birthday party went well, cake was eaten, a walk in nature, children fed and bathed and into bed, a lovely relaxing lavender bath and then a quiet and gentle yoga practice in silence, with the patchouli oil burning and the calming sodalite bracelet on my wrist.  It's good to be reminded of our humanness sometimes...there's another day tomorrow and let's face it, "all is well". x

The Joy of Yoga Nidra

Today I came across an article I wrote a while ago now for a Yoga magazine on the joys of Yoga Nidra.  I still thoroughly enjoy Yoga Nidra and have spent this year undertaking a foundation course on it.  This has meant I've practiced a lot of Yoga Nidra in all different formats and from different traditions this past year too, which has really helped me with the post-natal exhaustion.

I've also found that Yoga Nidra has helped to me to connect more deeply with my creativity, I've been writing a lot! I've also re-discovered a love of painting and have more creative ideas than I may have done previously.

Everyone should practice Yoga Nidra!  This is one of the reasons I incorporate Yoga Nidra into all of my retreats and ensure that we finish the Sunday morning Yoni Yoga class with one.  Bliss!!

If you'd like to know more then keep reading:

When I initially started practicing Yoga almost 10 years ago now, I simply could not relax.  It was impossible.  At the end of the Yoga class when the teacher announced Savasana, I would try and find any possible excuse to leave the class early so that I could avoid the last few minutes of relaxation. 

It was not so much that I was adverse to the idea of relaxation per se, it was more so that I found relaxing so mentally uncomfortable.  There were simply too many thoughts, too many tick lists, too many things I should be doing, rather than simply lying there on the floor trying to relax.

When I first ventured out to Byron Bay in Australia to immerse myself in Yoga a year into my practice, I shall never forget my first 2 hour Yoga session (the normal length of the classes out there at that time).  While I loved every single minute of the asana practice, the problem came, however, with a 20 whole minutes of quiet relaxation at the end of the class.  Proper quiet that is, with no music, no distraction, nothing.  Those were the longest 20 minutes of my life, or so it seemed in that moment!

Still with me attending these 2 hour sessions once or twice a day every day for a month and unable to leave the class early (many teachers will understandably discourage you from doing so), I quickly developed my own way of dealing with the mental chatter.  I imagined in my mind a train line with open trucks in which I placed each of my thoughts and then watched them pass by, one after the other, until I was able, eventually, to experience some relief from the constant background mental chatter.

Over the next year I practiced a lot of Yoga as I developed my practice both on and off the mat, qualifying as a Yoga teacher in the process.  My ability to relax improved hugely, but it wasn’t until I assisted on a teacher training course at Govinda Valley, Sydney that I discovered the joy and indeed benefit of Yoga Nidra. The relaxation became something I enjoyed rather than something that I endured at the end of a Yoga class.

I can still remember the experience of that first Yoga Nidra clearly.  There we were, the whole class of students, lying comfortably in the corpse pose, a bolster under knees and a blanket covering each of us to keep us warm as the teacher’s gentle voice soothed us into a state of cosy bliss as we relaxed each part of our body part by part, experiencing sensations and bringing awareness to the natural breath; it was a journey like no other I had experienced previously.

Time lost all meaning, what was actually 30 minutes felt like 5, and before I knew it we were back in the room, on our mats, in our bodies, feeling much more centred and grounded than I had felt at the beginning of the class.  What was also noticeable was the fact the mental chatter had eased, I had managed to drift beyond it into that wonderful state of being between being awake and asleep, the hypnotic state, where real healing takes place.  I felt brighter, lighter, rested and renewed. 

Essentially Yoga Nidra is a powerful meditation technique inducing complete physical, emotional and mental relaxation.   During Yoga Nidra one appears to be asleep but the consciousness is functioning at a deeper level of awareness so that you are prompted throughout the practice to say to yourself mentally, “I shall not sleep, I shall remain awake”.

Before beginning Yoga Nidra you make a Sankalpa, or a resolution for the practice.  The Sankalpa is an important stage of Yoga Nidra as it plants a seed in the mind encouraging healing and transformation in a positive direction.  The Sankapla is a short positive mental statement established at the beginning of the practice and said mentally to yourself in the present tense, as if it had already happened, such as “I am happy, healthy and pure light”, or “I am whole and healed”.

A Sankalpa can also be used to encourage you to let go of something in your life like smoking or overeating, focusing on the underlying feeling that leads you to smoke or to overeat such as “I love and care for myself and my body”, or “I choose to eat foods that support my health and wellbeing” or “I am relaxed and contented”.    In fact simply having the opportunity to establish a Sankalpa is powerful in itself as it gives you a focus and enhances your awareness of self.

It is actually in connecting with yourself that you come to realise all the deep seated tensions that Yoga Nidra helps you to release.  These are all the unconscious and unresolved issues that are playing a role in some of the unwanted habits and behaviour patterns you are noticing consciously.  This is the stuff that goes through your mind time and time again, the stuff you resolve to change at the beginning of each year but that “will” alone will not change.  What you need to do is get to the root of the problem and Yoga Nidra provides you with a means to do this.

With all the letting go of this “stuff”, such as trapped emotions and feelings, you become lighter and there is more energy available to be used in a more positive manner.  Plus with the power of intention in the form of Sankalpa, that which we attract into our life also changes.  It is in this way that Yoga Nidra offers us so much potential for transforming our lives in an even more positive direction than we can ever imagine.

Of course let us not forget the physiological benefits too, such as lowering of the heart rate and blood pressure, the release of lactate from the muscles that can cause anxiety and fatigue, a more restful night’s sleep and, ultimately, a calming and unwinding of the nervous system, which is basically the foundation of the body’s wellbeing.  So you see our physical health and sense of wellbeing can improve too.

Over the years Yoga Nidra has helped me in so many ways.  At times of crisis, when I have been tired and exhausted, sick and stressed, it has helped to restore, renew and heal me.  At confused times in my life when I have been unclear of the way forward then it has provided me with much needed clarity.  At other times it has helped me to let go of unhealthy addictions and behaviour patterns, the most profound was changing my relationship to myself and therefore enabling me to effortlessly let go of the need to smoke tobacco after so many years of battling with this nicotine addiction.

These days relaxation comes easily to me and I positively seek out and embrace any opportunity for Yoga Nidra for it is just such an amazing practice. In this stressful and fast paced world we live, where we can feel so disorientated and fragmented, it really helps to bring us back together and connect with ourselves again. Needless to say, I cannot promote the benefits of Yoga Nidra to you enough. But of course you cannot benefit from merely intellectualising these things, and reading about it will not necessarily change things.  What you really need to do is make a commitment to take the time out for yourself.  Lie comfortably, cover yourself with a blanket, close your eyes and allow yourself to be guided through a Yoga Nidra session.  I doubt you will regret it, in fact you may find it a life changing experience.

Happy Full Moon!

I managed a beautiful sea swim this evening with the full moon in Aries rising in front of us, we saw without our clothes too, it was very naughty and thoroughly liberating!

I was feeling the full moon rage yesterday and felt drawn to paint.  Today dawned blissfully calm as if the full moon had already peaked.  It's calm tonight too, crystals in the garden!

Enjoy the ride, the energy is very heightened on a full moon and it's an ideal time to forgive and acknowledge with gratitude all the wonderful things you might have in your life...creating spaces and higher vibration for new moon manifesting in two weeks time.

Happy new moon!

x