The joy of medicinal plants!

There’s many things that bring joy in my life, but I have to say that these Echinacea flowers are bringing enormous joy as I walk in and out of the cottage each day. I’m so grateful I thought to plant them here, so that I have to walk past them, they are without doubt my favourite of all the medicinal plants, because you can see their inherent energy, it’s no wonder they are so helpful at boosting our immune system.

I’d been putting it off for a good while because I love them so much, but the time had come to harvest a few of the flowers so that I can make a tincture for the winter months. It’s a little early, you should wait until the plant is three years old, or so I’m told, and these are only in their second year, but I’m keen to work with their medicine this year.

I have a ton of St John’s Wort this year too, which is wonderful, but my goodness, the picking is relentless! The flowers bloom over night so each morning I am greeted with this lovely yellowness, which I’ve been picking to make old and teas and now tinctures.

It’s been a little relentless these last few weeks, and especially since returning from Sark. I’ve gone through a significant amount of organic olive oil, soaking the various flowers, not only the St John’s Wort but a lot of lavender, Oil of Evening Primrose and Calendula too. I’ve also been drying a whole heap of plants for teas, not only the ones I’m growing, marshmallow being my favourite at the moment, but also out foraging for nettles and blackberry leaves and drying blackberries themselves to sweeten teas.

I’ve got a whole heap of gypsy wort and mother’s wort that I wasn’t sure what to do with, but I’m told that the best thing is to work with their medicine individually, to really know the plant and the reason that it’s come into my life. So watch this space. More often than not, this is the way to learn. I’ve found the same with Bach Flower remedies - while I’ve looked at doing more formal training, just working with them has helped me to know more of them and use them with other people in an effectual and helpful way.

Anyway, I hope that these photos bring you joy too, we should all be growing Echinacea, and brighting our collective landscape!

Love Emma x

It was a let go and go with the flow moon

In the end, the moon’s message was simple - go with the flow and let go.

There’s been change this last moon cycle for many people, and more ahead to come. I mean obviously life is always changing, but I mean more so in terms of perspective and making different choices, sometimes a complete change of heart choice. Sometimes, from nowhere, or so it seems, we do see things differently and the way we choose to live has no choice but to change to reflect this.

I’m seeing it in my life and I’m seeing it in other lives too.

Meanwhile my herbs are doing well. I’m up to my eyes in picking and drying and infusing oils. Tinctures and salves next. It’s non stop at this time of year as those of you growing will know only too well. But there’s always time for the beach and for the sea, and the sunset was beautiful this evening , as is moon rise right now.

Enjoy the wane, and the last week of August, let’s hope the weather is kind!

Love Emma x

Full moon crystals, potions and reminders

This is our second full moon in the sign of Aquarius, the last one was fairly potent for me, as was the new moon sandwiched between them. I’m hoping this one might be calmer and thus far it does seem that way…albeit there’s still time!

The message coming through is one of receptivity, trust and gratitude. I’ve felt in clients recently too.

This is receptivity as part of the whole, of unity and oneness. Often we can be much better at giving rather than receiving. When faced with receiving we may get embarrassed and automatically feel that we have to reciprocate without appreciating that sometimes just have to accept. Sometimes, underneath the resistance to receiving is a lack of self-worth and self-love. Some will feel more comfortable giving for this very reason. but as we know, each half makes a whole and each whole therefore comprises the balance of halves - give and take, inhale and exhale, light and dark, new moon and full moon, high tide and low tide and on it goes. Thus to appreciate our WHOLEness, we need to be open to giving and receiving and being OK with that. Easier said than done!

I’ve been noticing this in my yoga practice. There’s a sense of the thigh bone deepening its connection to hip joint. Can the hip joint be a comfortable and supportive place to receive? Can the knee joint both give and take? Can it straighten and bend? Can it find the dance to support the flow of life and find the humility to bend down if needed, the strength to straighten and allow us to stand up for what we believe in, and the movement to allow us to follow the path of the heart when called to do so without being stuck by fear, grief or sorrow? Can the foot receive the earth? Can we allow a resting after movement and movement after resting? Can the crown receive the support of the divine and trust in that?

Trust is another huge one. This is trust in the primordial support of the universe. Trust that all our needs will be met as we follow the path of the heart. Trust that every perceived mistake is actually another opportunity to learn and expand. Trusting in the divine (or whatever name you wish to us, universe, God etc) is not easy. It requires faith and a sense that whatever happens is happening for the highest interest of all levels of your being. Trust asks that you take a leap and fly without any certainty of outcome, letting go of any need to control this either. Fear keeps you stuck in the rational mind, trying to control and make certain.

The most life changing events happen without us having any seeming control over them, at leats that’s my experience. I write more about this in my new book, about to start it’s professional edit…life is made up of moments…the only thing asked of us, is to keep laughing and aligning and realigning to heart.

Gratitude of course comes next, or maybe at the very beginning. This isn’t wishy washy love and light gratitude, you know, listing things without really meaning any of it. I have a very bad habit of focusing on what I don’t have rather than what I do, it’s a hangover from the ‘achievement-focused’ education that conditioned my mind a certain way, well towards achievement and box ticking ultimately! I’ve been trying to change my mind and release this conditioning, but I still notice it and gratitude has come in on this full moon as a needed reminder. Gratitude alone, when practised with meaning, changes things.

I’m increasingly grateful for my health, which I often take for granted, especially as more and more friends tell me how they’re suffering from this ache and pain, or hormonal issue as they get older and blame it “on old age”. I don’t seem to be suffering in quiet the same way just yet, so I am very grateful to yoga, Ayurveda and Reiki for that. I’m grateful for E and my family and for E’s family too. We spend a lot of time together and our boys are growing up with three devoted grandparents, which is amazing - let alone the support E and I receive and the support I receive from him.

I’m grateful for so many things really, my friends, my home, this island and it’s safety - I sometimes think us Guerns must have done something good in a previous life to end up for here, when we could have been born in Afghanistan or Syria for example - for fresh air and the opportunity to experience so much freedom - mind, speech, thought, even travel to a certain extent (mainly because I don’t want to go further than Sark even if the whole world was open to me at this time, well OK, I’d still like to get to Nepal, but heck, Sark is amazing and on our doorstep!). There’s so much to be grateful for. Always someone else worse off, someone who can be helped, always there’s that motivation, because life is so bright really, even if it doesn’t feel like it at times.

But that’s life. Our mind’s are tricky things and much of our suffering is self created. I don’t know how anyone survives without a spiritual practice, the pace of life makes it tricky at the best of times, and there’s huge stresses out there at the moment. But you know, gratitude. It could always be worse.

So I’ll leave you with that as I’m heading out to catch the waxing moon, we have a date.

Don’t forget to get yours crystals out, and any potions you've made.

Love Emma x

Sark

It’s simple,

Sark equals nature, healing and freedom.

Love this island. Each trip reveals a new spot. Yesterday a seal. There’s serpentine in the rocks. Quartz, pyrite, Jasper too. There’s a ton of blackberries. The land is alive. The trees speak. There’s a Goddess and lots of remains of dolmens. There’s a lot of fairies. Dolphins too. Yoga, Reiki and massage. Incredible local chocolate at Caragh’s. Fresh produce. The winds of change. Fresh air. Swimming in the sea on your own. It’s the most healing place I’ve ever encountered.

Thank you Sark.

The changing Way

Well that was a potent new moon and star alignment wasn’t it! When the new moon peaked at 2.34pm I was out walking with my Wiccan cousin who was feeling new moon agitation whereas I was feeling relatively calm and thinking I may have gotten away with it, but alas, about 20 minutes after the peak I received a message which triggered an old pattern and that was the beginning of the end!

I don’t know why I was surprised. I’d spent the morning recording some videos for the online Reiki Level One training and was fully powered up on bio-dynamic exercises, Gassho meditation, sharing Reiki, to say nothing of the checking-in. That and the visit to a moon-aligned sacred site the night before and I had unwittingly set myself up perfectly.

I should have known it would be potent, 8th of the 8th, 8th a significant number, the infinity sign noels, as above so below. The ground dropped away for a time and clearing out a couple of dolmens that evening provably didn’t help matters. I was so tired and I know I was not alone, others have said they felt extraordinarily tired Sunday evening too.

Monday wasn’t much better, there was a heaviness and a weariness as the wheels fell off so to speak and this continued anon to Tuesday as the revealed pattern played out, the inner child was held, the Leo new moon rumblings rumbled on and the hard to face truth dawned. Yikes. It’s so uncomfortable when we see the way we create our own chaos, and the manner in which we hold on so tightly to it too, defending it, believing that it is THE WAY.

This is when LEO revealed itself, not least the rage that had accompanied the energy shift, but the courage of the lion, the roar as we are told a few home truths and finally take ownership of them, rather than allowing ourselves to play the victim. Urgh. So very uncomfortable, but a necessary part of the process to re-orientate the Way.

You see the Way changes and it is knowing when we need to bend to accommodate the change, and allow ourselves to be transformed into something else. It’s about letting go (always blinking letting go) if the way that we define ourselves as much as anything else, and it is this that is difficult because we define ourselves so rigidly at times, that it’s difficult to break this down comfortably.

Ultimately it’s about disintegration and stripping away the layers down to core essence. Unity is the greatest illuminator and this can help to transform patterns and indeed structures, freeing us from things that no longer serve us (it can be as simple, or as difficult as a thought pattern) and that get in the way of our wholeness.

Upon reflection, the new moon was really asking us to look at our cherished beliefs, ideals and identities and examine, reexamine, illuminate, release and transform these. Are we really who we think we are? Are we really those labels with which we identify? Or is there more to us than we allow? In our quest to follow THE WAY do we limit ourselves because we’re not open to there being another way?

I’m really aware of this in the spiritual field. You know how we might separate and divide things - one’s spiritual, ones material, one’s therefore good, one’s therefore bad, without appreciating the goodness and badness in every thing and the spiritual and material in everything too. Once again it comes back to perspective and how we perceive ourselves and the world we live in.

I' remember my earlier days as a yoga teacher and feeling that I had to behave a certain way, that I had to have all my crap sorted if I was to be a sincere teacher. I’ve mentioned this before. The problem arose in my false perception of believing I needed to behave and be a certain way because of a label given to me. Ultimately all I can ever be is me, with all my vast imperfections. Being a yoga teacher changes nothing and more fool anyone for thinking that a label all of sudden means that you are sorted and - careful, careful - that you are better than others, all of a sudden wise, for example.

Nope, we’re all in this together, all muddling along as best we can, doing our best for our children, for then planet and for ourselves. We can only ever work with where we’re at, how we came in and the level of consciousness that we now bring into this world, and that will be dependant on all sorts of things. The moon is always trying to raise vibration, she picks us up and throws us around when she knows that it is time for us to wake up a little bit more and make changes. She takes no prisoners. It’s not an easy Way following her, because she’s not constant, or consistent, hmm, sound familiar, invite the moon into your life and you’ll know what I mean!

So the new moon encouraged us to examine dissonance in our lives and to let go, embracing (with courage) the really tricky disintegration process without resisting it or judging it - or judging yourself. Anything that is over-defined or inflexible needs to change! It’s an amazing time - the portal is open - to strip away anything that defines and limits you. Be free. Create a new WAY. Some fo you will find that you have no choice, that the universe has intervened.

As you let go so you create space for the new, and it will come, but it will be subject to divine timing. There may be more letting go first, more release of rigidity, more breaking down, more darkness to sit in first, more loose ends to tie up, more order brought to the chaos. As the walls come tumbling down (and it will absolutely feel like this, all the walls you have built around your heart especially, and your solar plexus, to protect your vulnerability) so the true YOU can burst through, with vision of a NEW WAY and a new direction.

Some of you will have felt a tuning to your third eye. Others will have felt an agitation deep inside. Others will have felt the endless tears and not known the reason for this. And others will have felt nothing at all. It’s our experience, our way, but it’s a helpful idea to open up to all other possibilities and ways…

The new moon showed the way. It was time. The stars and planets were aligned. I’m grateful for that. I finally moved forward with publishing From Darkness Comes Light, I couldn’t help but laugh at the timing. While the disintegration feels like a death, the space it creates feels like calm and gentle, it’s a relief!

Happy wax!

x

Another cycle begins

Happy new moon!

The new moon peaks at 2.34pm before beginning its wax. I went to sit in its darkness last night on L’Ancresse common on one of the ancient sites, the most ancient site in the whole of Europe, and was treated to stars overhead and Sirius shining brightly.

It’s a kind moon, to me at least. I’ve been writing a manual to accompany a Menstruation and Moon Online Awakening thing that I’ve had in mind for a while now but never had the time to do anything about. So I have been feeling into the moon more than usual this last moon cycle or so, in me as much as anything else, in my own cycle. I have become increasingly aware that there is a timing to everything. An absolute divine timing.

Things happen when they are ready to happen and when everything is aligned perfectly. It’s tricky if you are a doer and an achiever and get impatient easily, wanting results and validation instantly. I’ve really had to work with this over the last few months, of noticing my patterns and going deeper into them and settling and accepting the discomfort that this brings.

Bu the more I have let go of the need to control (the last full moon really brought that home to me, that there is always a flow to be found) the more easeful life has on some level become. This last few days have been magical in their own beautiful way, because the timing has been just right for more of the mystery to reveal itself. Yet at the same time the more that reveals itself, the more I ask questions and the more I have to be aware of letting this go too. We are always given what we need when we most need it - blessings and burdens (and remember that a blessing is a burden as much as a burden is a blessing!).

I’ve been increasingly switching off from main stream media and all the drama with the vaccine, from both sides of the camp. It’s become increasingly apparent how much fear motivates choice. I’ve also been switching away from reading any sort of info on what the planetary shifts and moon cycle may be bringing, which has been liberating too. So much of this is also driven by fear and the need for certainty and for wanting things to be different and saying it as such.

I’ve noticed this year more than others how people are talking about the Lionsgate portal opening despite this opening every year. In fact when I was researching what was said in 2020 to see if there are commonalities with what’s been said this year too, one website was just using the same content this year that was used last year, just changing the dates! The Lionsgate opens every year, why this year are we getting more excited about it? What do people want to gain from it? Spiritual growth without the work? Certainty that life is going to get back to normal?

If you’ve been getting excited about the Lionsgate portal opening, have you asked yourself the underlying reason for this? What are you hoping to gain? What changes would you like it to usher into your life and can you make them anyway? I just can’t help wondering if we are always waiting for something other than out beautiful self to make the changes we seek in our lives, or for things to change without us actually having to do anything about it.

And things can change without us doing anything about it, as in, the universe can usher in significant change for us, the last full moon certainly did this to me, but this doesn’t mean I wasn’t still part of that process, I still had to go through the mill so to speak. There doesn’t seem to be any other way. We have to face our crap to break through to the other side and let go. It’s a painful process, but often rewarding and enlightening too.

I suppose what I’m saying is we cannot bypass and yet I can’t help thinking that new age spiritualism tries to do exactly that, hoping that some planetary shift or moon cycle will do the work and change us without us having to be involved in then process. I might be wrong, it’s just an observation.

It’s absolutely a time to take people off the spiritual pedestals we have put them on too. This can be a painful process in itself when we realise the humanness of those we look up to, thinking that they are somehow more evolved than we are. More fool anyone for putting themselves on a spiritual pedestal either, and believing them superior to anyone else. If you notice yourself doing that then take heed, this is an indication that the spiritual ego has taken hold.

We’re all of us trying to find out way, and we all of us are as human as the next with our foibles and our neurosis and the patterns that we need to work through. But let’s not get too serious either. We are joy and happiness too. We are allowed to feel joy and happiness in each moment if we allow it. Sometimes we can take it all a bit too serious and forget to have fun and play and nurture our inner child - this is often all we need, to laugh, play and take ourselves more lightly - this universe is one of love and benevolence, of vibration and inherent creativity.

If there’s one message I have received from this new moon it is to recognise our magnificence and to love fearlessly, getting out of our own way and the patterns we have created to protect our heart from vulnerability, that limit our potential to love unconditionally. Also to switch off and switch in because we will always be shown the way and it will be OUR way, so it will probably not make sense to anyone else and that absolutely doesn’t matter - when we know we know and often our knowing cannot be explained in a language that will be understood by anyone else and nor should we ever feel that we have to validate our experiences or seek validation of them.

It’s a kind moon showing us more of our way, it’s validating! It has a roar though, so watch that. Enjoy it and the darkness and the opportunity to see the stars shining brightly over head and all that this reveals. I’ll see you on the other side as a new cycle begins.

Love Emma x

Happy Lammas

Happy Lammas!

I love the energy of Lammas, and the bread making that I attempt to do each year as an offering to the Mother Goddess.

Lammas is the celebration of the first grain harvest - we are now in high summer with the union of the sun and earth and god and goddess producing this first harvest. Lammas marks the time for gathering in and giving thanks for abundance.

The word ‘lammas’ is derived from ‘loaf mass’ and is indicative of how central and honoured is the first grain and the first loaf of the harvesting cycle. It’s a good excuse to make bread, even if I don’t eat it, the boys do and enjoy it too.

I did attempt a sunrise at a sacred site aligned to Lammas sunrise, with a stone to Mother Goddess. The sky was heavy with rain but the energy has kept me going all day. It’s an energy of retreat for me now, a drawing in, as the nights are already drawing in and will draw in quickly now as we head to the autumnal equinox. It’s the wane after such a potent full moon!

Signs of the wane in nature and the seasonal shift are all around us; I tasted my first blackberry yesterday up at St Germain Nature Reserve where I was honoured to teach a yoni yoga class as part of a baby shower. I’d forgotten how beautiful it is up there and would love to try and arrange a drop-in one when I’ve had enough of retreating!

For now though, it’s time to enjoy the first harvest and my plants are keeping me busy and the boys and the Goddess too, in her own way.

Happy Lammas and I hope you have a lovely wane with the moon too.

x

Full moon lessons and learnings

Well that was certainly a memorable full moon, up there with my waters breaking on the super full moon in October 2016, while in the middle of a yoga retreat on Herm. This time we were on Sark and camping, this when a significant storm was forecast for our first night…

I hadn’t really given it too much thought to be honest, the weather reports are frequently incorrect at the moment, and sometimes these storms can drift offshore, plus E was perfectly contented to go ahead with our camping plans, so the impending storm seemed insignificant somehow. 

Perhaps though on some level I had a sense, because knowing that we would be on Sark on the full moon, I had planned a trip to one of the spiritual sites, but as it got closer and I saw the forecast, I ended up communing and celebrating with the moon the day before instead, on Guernsey at a moon temple of sorts instead. This was amazing actually, as the skies were so clear and the moon so bright and there was definitely a message around trust, surrender and love coming up.

Little did I realise how much this message would be validated the next night, as the moon waxed towards peak, due 2.32am on the Saturday morning. Friday evening though, found us by then on Sark, tent up at La Vallette, a beautiful campsite albeit exposed to easterly winds. The storm was ushering in winds from the east as luck would have it, but I didn’t think too much of this as I settled under the duvet on the inflatable mattress, Eben beside me, both of us asleep almost immediately as it was 10pm by then.

11pm and E woke me with a start, shining his torch and telling me that we had a problem, the tent was being buffeted to the extent that the side closest to him had collapsed in. I looked at it, wondering initially how we might move away from that side and huddle towards Eben and I, but then the dawning reality hit – the tent pole was broken and the rain was literally pouring in, and the rest of the tent was about to collapse in and us and we had the children asleep to protect. I knew immediately then that we were screwed, so to speak, I think I might have used a stronger word at the time. 

It was a panic then, Elijah was soon awake and terrified, as I tried to bundle a heavy and sleeping Eben into my arms and grabbed the double duvet and a blanket, and then attempted to find the zip to open the door of the tent, feeling panicked myself now about the possibility of not being able to find my way out of the tent, given the relentless nature of the wind, and now the thunder and lightening cracking literally overhead.

I managed to unzip the door and forced myself out into the torrential rain and the battering winds, E with Elijah behind me, and we ran towards the barn, barefoot, feeling as if we were running through a stream of water and mud. Elijah ran off the wrong way, and E had to go grab him, as I sprinted for the barn, Eben heavy in my arms and trying to keep a hold of the duvet and blanket too.

In the darkness of the barn, I had a sense of where the hay bales were located as I’d strangely had a look earlier that day when I was trying to find somewhere to dry our wet towels. I didn’t really think what I was doing, as I threw the duvet on the dirty floor for us to huddle on, Elijah shivering with terror, as Eben was still sleepily held against me. I covered us with the blanket, while E set off back to the tent to see if he could retrieve our other duvet, which he did, now virtually soaking wet.

But it kept us warm to an extent, comforted against the elements, as he headed off again, this time to grab our bag of clothes, fortunately contained within our one waterproof bag (I shall be forever grateful for my decision to spend the money to buy this bag), and the electronics and whatever else he could hold in his hands. By then the lightening was literally lightening the sky and I was terrified for his safety as much as I was for us huddled together, not really having a clue what we were going to do, Elijah demanding a quick resolution. 

In his soaking wet boxers and t-shirt, E headed off to the main house and awoke the poor owner who was asleep in her chair at the time. I don’t believe she had any idea what was happening outside, but directed us to the one and only family pod, which was fortunately free at the time. E came and collected us and we ran as quickly as we could in the darkness and the rain and wind, still the thunder and lightning crashing overhead, to the pod, a short distance from the barn.

I can’t tell you the relief to make it into the pod and feel safe. The adrenalin was coursing through my veins by then and I set about immediately changing the children into dry clothes. It quickly became apparent though that we still had a problem as the pod was only equipped with 4 inflatable mattresses and no bedding. Our bedding was drenched and the best I could find in the clothes bag was two children’s towels and a scarf.

E set back off to the tent to retrieve torches and to visit his mum who  was in the tent next to us, a smaller and more aerodynamic tent, which was able to weather the storm, like every other tent on the campsite, bar another family who decamped into their friend’s bell tent. E’s mum was understandably concerned and terrified herself by the cracking and thundering overhead and as I was attempting to settle the boys in their thin towels, she was soon also in the pod with us.  

Being such a kind soul, she gave us her warm sleeping bag, which we were able to stretch over most of the four of us (E and I had half each, on the end as we were, all of us squeezed onto 2 inflatable mattresses). My mother in law lay on one of the inflatable mattresses and all of us attempted to go to sleep. My mother in law though couldn’t stop chatting and E was trying to quieten her and all of a sudden I began hysterically giggling, a form of release form all the adrenalin. I was also struggling to process what had just happened and knew that sleep was unlikely. 

It hit me actually, how I had said only hours earlier to a soul friend by text, that I wouldn’t be doing to celebrate the full moon on Sark as I was tired and the weather wet and I needed to prioritise time for processing, reading and family. Here I was now, very much reminded of the sacredness of family and also the necessity for allowing time for processing. I have a habit of over scheduling and never properly allowing time for the processing, not least of the work done with clients, but also the work done on myself. 

But the family actually, was a very necessary reminder. Eben’s 4-year old testosterone boost has been challenging us on many levels, as I have also been navigating an end to breastfeeding after 4 years and nine months, not only in terms of what this means for Eben and I as we move to another stage of our relationship as mother and son, but also in terms of the hormonal shifts that this transition brings with it. At times he has been like a lightning storm in our home, wreaking havoc on everyone, especially his sensitive and gentle older brother. 

Huddled together, dry and safe, I was reminded that nothing else was actually important. I couldn’t help thinking of Syrian refugees who have had to endure fleeing war torn lands and literally walk for their lives, stuck in refugee camps, living hand to mouth. I honestly don’t know how they survive such an experience night after night. And yet I sort of do, because a deep drive for survival kicks in, to protect the lives of your family and yourself. Nothing else is important, possessions are meaningless, they come and go. But family, that’s different. It’s a very old energy that comes up from the root chakra to survive and protect.

I can’t be sure I slept. At some point the storm drifted away, my mother-in-law returned to her tent for warmer clothes, I tossed and turned, it was impossible to get comfortable and an effort to stay warm. I couldn’t have been happier then when the new day dawned, it was only 5.10am by then but I was in desperate need for tea. Tea helps everything. Tea has saved me on many an occasion, late night travels in foreign lands, traipsing up Mount Everest, the shock of birth and motherhood, the loss of loved ones. And now, a campsite on Sark. Tea made it all ok again.

We surveyed the wreckage of our tent and everything soaking wet. While we waited for the kindly owner of the campsite to wake up there was nothing else to do but head for an early morning high tide swim, another necessary grounding experience. Back at the campsite the owner offered to attempt to dry our bedding, confirming we could stay in the pod for the next night too (we were booked to attend a festival and didn’t want to give up and go home, we love Sark!). I shall always be grateful for the kindness she showed us 

Later that day the moon confirmed more of her full moon teachings and lessons. Elijah and I joined my soul Sark friend for a trip to Grand Greve for a swim and ramble. As we walked towards the Coupee we could see heavy skies over Jersey and I commented that I hoped that the weather wasn’t heading our way. My Sark friend said there was a possibility it might blow further south, and I hoped for that.

But alas, no, the horrendous weather headed our way and it wasn’t long before the rain started falling and we found ourselves having little choice but to huddle in a cave to shelter from the worst of it. We thought it might ease but it just got worse, so after a time we accepted that unless we wanted to stay in the cave all afternoon we were probably going to have to face the torrential rain and get off the beach. Of course we managed a quick sea swim first!

Leaving the beach was certainly an interesting experience, my Sark friend had never seen anything like this before on Sark. The rain run-off water was literally pouring down the steep steps reminding Elijah and I of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory’s liquid chocolate. Only this was sadly not chocolate and there was the concern of a land slipe as the cliff face is unsteady on that beach, as it is on many of the Sark beaches, we have seen rock falls.

But alas we made it to the top unscathed, albeit drenched through even in our water proofs! My Sark friend suggested we might return with her to her house for a bath and a change of clothes and whereas usually I would reject such an offer of help, not wanting to inconvenience her and because of my fierce independence, but alas I was so cold and so wet that I actually accepted her offer of help and I’m so pleased I did. 

So while E waited out the rain in the pod with Eben and his mum, Elijah and I enjoyed a lovely bath, a picnic in the lounge, and clean clothes. Even this was a liberating experience, to wear clothes that were not my own, this when I got beyond the trigger of clothing sizing, a hangover from my eating-disorder days. It helped me to see this too from a different perspective, as my Sark friend is an inspiration in only buying clothes from charity shops, my mission for this 47th year (to not buy any new clothes that is). 

I recognised that the moon has ushered in a healing to the root chakra. This chakra is like Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, ensuring that we have food to eat, clothes to wear, shelter above our heads and can continue the species – survival individually and collectively as human beings. This strips away all the crap around what we’re eating, wearing and living in, the fundamental issue is about whether what we’re eating, wearing and living in is keeping us nourished, warm, dry and safe. 

It also wasn’t lost on me that my yoga teacher has been taking me on a journey to receive more of the upper arm bones in the shoulder joints and the thigh bones in the hips, so that I can find more of my centre and freedom of spine and mind. I definitely felt more freedom than I have felt for a long time and it struck me as I cycled back to the campsite yesterday that freedom and love are all that really matters, to me at least. Freedom of speech, freedom in love, freedom of mind, freedom to live from heart etc. 

I have to say that I felt incredibly nurtured and nourished by all the help received, and extremely free too, liberated, because of all this was very reminiscent of my full moon experience in Herm, where I was reminded that the universe always has our back and will always support us when we surrender and trust. I had no choice but to trust and go with the flow. My faith had been deepened and I felt extremely calm and comforted by this as I had done when my waters broke all those years ago. 

It was only later that it also dawned on me that there was another lesson that I was being encouraged to learn. Two weeks previously when we had visited Sark for Sark Fest, I had visited the charity shop as I love to do. A book jumped out at me, as has happened previously, there’s something about this place! Last time it was just days before the first lockdown when I was running a yoga retreat on Sark and stress levels were high the virus was a real risk.

In the charity shop a book jumped out called ‘The Game of Life and How to Play it” by Florence Shinn. Iopened the book by chance on page 51 and there in front of me were written these exact words:

“Perhaps one’s fear is of disease or germs. Then one should be fearless and undisturbed in a germ-laden situation, and he would be immune. One can only contract germs while vibrating at the same rate as the germ, and fear drags men down to the level of the germ”. It was totally relevant at the time and I have taken much comfort in that ever since. 

This time the book was about receiving love, which was pertinent as I had recently been discussing this with a soul friend; how much easier it is at times to give love rather than receive it. I had been reading the book on and off, bits of it resonated and bits of it not. I wasn’t sure whether to continue reading it but had brought it with me to Sark, together with two other books such was my over-confidence in having any time to read books!

As it happened the book had got soaked in the storm and while I had attempted to leave it to dry in the earlier sun, it was likely totally soaked through again with the recent downpour. I realised though, that I didn’t really now need to read it, because I had opened myself up to receiving, not least from the campsite owner, but from my Sark friend too. Inevitably it had brought up feelings of having to somehow reciprocate their kindness, but once I got over this, I realised that it’s really lovely receiving from others, and it gave them the opportunity to help.

The rain didn’t stop though and we found ourselves huddling in the Bel Air with members of Buffalo Huddleston funnily enough, who were also huddling from the atrocious weather. I made it to the festival in time to enjoy some Himalayan fare and the end of one of the bands, before I had to head home to put the boys to bed. I couldn’t have been happier to settle onto the inflatable mattresses with our virtually dry duvets knowing that we were safe and warm.

Years ago I would have struggled with all of this; of no sheets, no pillows, no duvet covers, no showers before bed. But none of it seems the least bit important anymore. All our wet clothes and possessions also didn’t phase me. And coming home Sunday evening to find our WIFI and telephone line dead, our freezer semi-defrosted and the cat’s excrement and attempts at peeing in a plant pot stinking out our office space, did not phase me either. 

The moon had unexpectedly ushered in change. It cleared the energy in a stupendous way. It brought us back together as a family, reminding me of the importance of fun and adventure, and of living simply. I was also reminded of the need to go with the flow and trust in the universe, it helped me to accept help and receive love and it deepened by faith in the process. I’m hoping it will last, and my washing machine will survive all the washing…and we’ll adjust to living life offline…another necessary experience ushered in.