Emma Despres Emma Despres

April 2015 - Vasisthasana (side plank pose)

Following on from the Spring Equinox, a Libra Full Moon Eclipse on 4 April sets the energy for this month, encouraging us to align with our truth and embrace a sense of balance and equilibrium in our lives. 

The word ‘balance’ comes from the Latin word balare, which means to dance so we are therefore encouraged to dance as we balance our individual needs with the needs of our families, friends and each other in this world.

This is easier said than done, it is very difficult to maintain a balance – anyone who has tried to chant the same note twice will be aware of this -  life on our Planet is always in a state of flux, nothing is constant, and everything is subject to change and transformation.

As such we must find a means of dancing with our world as it moves, a way of feeling both the richness of joy and sadness and of embracing the rhythms of life with all its ups and downs.

We must learn to let go and open to movement, embracing opportunities that challenge our way of thinking, of recognizing our fixed way of thinking that prevents us from dancing with life and opening to new possibilities, or that keep us in our comfort zone and prevent us from truly living.

On our mats, what better way to challenge our approach to life, of dancing and embracing all aspects of ourselves than by practicing the balancing pose, Vasisthasana. 

‘Vasistha’ translates as most excellent, best, and richest.  Vasistha was an ancient Indian sage (or series of sages), and was said to be the owner of Nandini, the “cow of plenty” who made him the master of every desirable object, which accounts for his infinite wealth.

The challenge of this pose is not one of flexibility, but instead of maintaining a neutral alignment of the spine and legs and the position of the arms against gravity. The asymmetrical relationship to gravity means that muscles have to work asymmetrically to create a symmetrical alignment of the body – a dance therefore in balancing the body from every side.

Benefits

  • Strengthens arms, core and legs

  • Tone core sheath

  • Stretches and strengthens wrists

  • Stretches back of thighs

  • Improves balance

    Contraindications

  • Wrist, elbow and shoulder injuries

    Photography by Nick Despres, please see www.nickdespres.com

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Events Emma Despres Events Emma Despres

Herm 2015

Admittedly the weather was not as Spring-like as I would have liked but nonetheless the Beinspired Spring yoga wellbeing retreat was hugely enjoyable.

In fact with many of the same people joining the retreat year after year it is getting to be quite a familiar event, so that each year seems even more relaxed, enjoyable and “in the flow” than the one previously.

Of course much of the enjoyment of the weekend comes from simply being on the magical traffic-free and out-of-season Island of Herm with all its natural beauty to ourselves, and trusting in the process and allowing these retreats to take on their own beautiful energy.

The yoga itself was marvellous, and I was truly humbled by the commitment and focus shown by those attending - the classes which were suitable for all levels of ability and were filled with lightness and humour. It was an inspiration truly, students taking the leap of faith and practicing poses they have never practiced previously (on their own or assisted by Vicki and I).  What a joy, limitations challenged and transformation taking place before our very eyes.

And what a joy too to join together in such a beautiful setting, with stunning views from the yoga space over to the East Coast of Guernsey and us coming together to consciously breathe, move, meditate, chant, relax, let go and laugh. What a wonderful way to spend a cold March weekend.

There was plenty of time away from the mat too for relaxation or activity.  Eight joined the invigorating led run with JP Macé and Debbie Stokes, nine joined the led walk (including some foraging!) with the very informative Herm guide Lesley Bailey, and six of us managed the lunchtime swim in the sea at Hotel Beach (it was indeed freezing!).

There were treatments on offer too, holistic massage with Hayley Le Marquand, reflexology with Christine Shepherd, Reiki with Joanne Henton and food insensitivity testing with Sophie Shand. Needless to say all the ladies were fully booked with waiting lists and the treatments/testing were a real compliment to the weekend for those indulging.

The Mermaid excelled themselves again this year too and the vegetarian food was really yummy and was enjoyed by everybody.  In fact Ewan, who is a connoisseur of chocolate brownies, concluded that the Friday night chocolate brownie was the best he has ever tasted!  I particularly enjoyed the chickpea and spinach curry with brown rice and the rather tasty roasted vegetables and rye bread, to say nothing of the scrummy greens.  What a treat not to have to cook too!

For me, after weeks of preparation and the usual last minute rushing around, the weekend always passes far too quickly, especially now with Elijah joining the weekend.  Still Ewan, Elijah and I managed to fit in a couple of brisk walks to soak in the Herm energy and take in the views across to Guernsey and check out the moo moos and the ancient stones. We even managed a sandcastle on the beach in spite of the rather chilly weather!

I wish we could manage a couple of retreats on Herm each year, this beautiful Island really does have such a special spiritual and relaxing energy so that even though we were only away for 2 nights, life had most definitely slowed down a pace by the time we got home.  There is something so primal and heartening, grounding then, and enlivening about being so in touch with the elements and nature like you are on Herm, it really is so nourishing for the soul.

I am really grateful to my Mum for all her help with preparing for the retreat, to Vicki for both assisting in the classes and her general support, to JP, Debbie, Lesley, Hayley, Christine, Joanne, Sophie, Sion, Tom and his team and of course Ewan and Elijah for helping to turn dreams into reality and help make a weekend on Herm very special. Om Shanti.

Needless to say we have booked Herm for the 2016 retreat, 11-13 March 2016.








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Mindfulness Emma Despres Mindfulness Emma Despres

Letting go

For a while now I have dreamt of bringing together a group of like-minded spirit and moon ladies to celebrate the full moon and give thanks to the Goddess of the Moon for all she has done to support our lives.  

Thursday 5 March and my dream came true as a group of my lovely spirit ladies could all come together on the same evening!. I decided to opportune the energy of the full moon and our first full moon gathering by partaking in a burning bowl ceremony.  I have done this ceremony a few times now and I have always found it to be a fabulous way of letting go of stuff no longer needed in life.   Furthermore, the energy of the full moon encourages “letting go” so it is an ideal time to do this kind of thing.

The theme of “letting go” has been on my mind all week.  The mindfulness course has thrown this into my awareness a little, for to live in the moment does involve a certain amount of letting go.  Letting go of one’s expectations for the future.  And letting go of one’s attachment to past events. This awareness has made it more obvious to me how much of our lives are indeed spent reflecting on the past and planning into the future.

This can lead to all sorts of suffering as we consider how we should have done this or should have done that, or how we will do this or will do that, constantly taking our mind away from the present moment. It can often be very difficult to let go of these thoughts, they can be all consuming, especially the ones that are involved in any decision making.  There is a wonderful saying, “let go, and let God in”, makes sense really, if only we can let go to let in…

Needless to say that this is all much easier said than done.  Just catching yourself thinking of the past or the future is an achievement in itself, let alone managing to let go of whatever that thought process was going to be.  But hey, that in itself a letting go too, the one that judges the self for not managing to do what one intended, that is to say, living in the present moment with mindful awareness!!

I have come to notice some of my own tendencies to self-berate when I do not live up to my own standards and expectations.  Silly really as I know that I am not alone in giving myself a hard time.  And I guess I have reflected on this a little more so recently not least because of the increased time I have spent studying my mental fluctuations but because a very dear friend of the family has been given only a few months to live and this has made me consider how short our life really is, especially far too short to be unpleasant to oneself.

But even with this awareness it is incredible how much we still take on.  I was made very aware of this in the office last week.  Someone has asked me to do something, which they could have done themselves and they asked me in such a tone that I confess it hit a nerves and I could not resist making them aware that they could have done it themselves without too much effort.

They apologised and I returned to my desk feeling terrible for there was really no need for me to make the comment, I should just have let it all go from the outset – so what if they could do it themselves, they had asked me to do it, and I should have done it without the need for judgement or drama.  Sitting back down at my desk,  I commented to my rather wise work colleague that I felt bad about the situation and she responded rather quickly with “ah get over it, I can guarantee he let it go the moment you left the room”.

Time stood still.  The penny dropped.  Of course!  How silly of me, here I was holding on to the past, holding on to an experience that no longer needed to be in my awareness.  It was done.  Over.  And yet I found myself still thinking about it and digesting it later that afternoon and almost laughed out loud when I realised what I was doing.  And it is funny to me now but seriously, how often do we do this?!

Well I am sure we all do this quite a bit, digest and mull over and think about our interactions with others and how we should have said this, and we hope they weren’t feeling this, or perhaps we should have done that.  Oh my gosh, it is not surprising that we often feel quite exhausted.  Our minds with its incessant thinking and judging and evaluating and imaging (yes get that, actually imagining what/why someone has/has not done this) exhausts us, simple as that.  All of us in this position just need to take a deep breath in and let it all go.  Simple!!

This reminds me of a little story I heard a few years ago…

“One day, two monks set out for a temple in a valley beyond the woods. While cutting a pathway through the woods they came across a choppy stream to cross. There, stood by the bank of the stream, was a beautiful young maiden dressed in silk. She was clearly at a loss as to how to cross without getting muddy and wet.

So, without thinking twice, the elder monk picked her up over his shoulder and waded across to the other side. The younger monk followed in tow.

Upon reaching the other side of the bank the elder monk put her down. The maiden paid her respects and the monks continued on their way to the temple.

As they continued to navigate the forest, the younger monk, still troubled by the stream crossing, said suddenly, “How could you do that? We aren’t even supposed to make eye contact with women let alone pick them up and carry them!”

Without a thought, the elder monk turned to the younger monk and said, “Are you still carrying her?  I put her back down on the other side of the stream”.

And with that he turned and led the way through the forest.”

 

It is a good story – the ability of the first monk to put the needs of another human being before his own spiritual practice, and then be able to just let go of the fact he had done so without feeling guilty or disappointed, is a lesson to us all.  Essentially we must try not to allow yesterday’s thoughts to affect today’s progress, because letting go of the past is necessary to truly live today.

So this brings me back to the merits of a burning bowl ceremony, which help us to let go a little of old ways of being or those aspects of our life no longer serving us, so that we can create space to bring in new ways of being. Here is more information on it…

 

Burning Bowl Ceremony

The Burning Bowl ceremony is a kind of fire ceremony that has been used in various traditions for a number of years.

The Burning Bowl ceremony involves writing the negative conditions that you would like to release from your life on a piece of paper, then burning the paper in the bowl, which turns your prayers to smoke and sends them to the Universe.

The purpose of the ceremony is to release old patterns, beliefs or experiences, or anything that impedes you from realising your true self, moving forward and/or changing things. Essentially by sending the old unwanted conditions up to the Universe in the smoke, you clear the way for new beginnings. It is a very powerful way of letting go so that you can move on… and potentially… feel light and free.

Once you have let go, you therefore create space to let in.  Thus the second part of the ceremony is to focus your attention on what you would like to create in your life, write those intentions on paper, put them in an envelope, and put the envelope away for at least a year.  Just leave it be and let your prayers go to the Universe to manifest them.

If you would like to join in with the Burning bowl ceremony then please use one of the attached pieces of paper to write down those negative conditions you would like to release from your life and bring with you to the fire on Saturday morning and watch it burn….then let go, no need to think more on it.

Instead – and perhaps wait until the end of the retreat when you have more clarity - use the other piece of paper to write what you would like to create in your life. Put your name and the date on the piece of paper and maybe write “with gratitude and thanks to the Universe” or something similar and then put in the envelope and make a note not to open it for at least a year.  Take it home, put it in a drawer and forget about it…until you find it in at least a year’s time…

“There is a place where words are born of silence, A place where the whispers  of the heart arise.”—RUMI

With gratitude

x  

 

 

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Mindfulness Emma Despres Mindfulness Emma Despres

Truth be told

So truth be told, the mindfulness course and the mindfulness practices have helped me to realise that this last year has been very stressful, that I have been stressed.

It is funny really, a yoga teacher admitting to being stressed.  But I am only human after all.  There was a time when I used to out all yoga teachers on pedestals and believe them to be pure and sorted and calm and serene.  I finally realised that this is indeed far from the truth, that we all have a shadow side, we all have our issues that we are working through.  We are none of us perfect, we are human that is all!

Still it is one thing to recognise one’s state of being and quite another to do something about it.  However I do believe that once one has come to recognise and accept the aspects of one’s life that are no longer working, well the Universe intervenes and change occurs.  I guess this is a reflection of the change in perception on the inside…and with that a change of being on the outside. This reminded me, again (always a good reminder) that the way to make positive changes in one’s life is to make positive changes to one’s mind.

This new awareness has seen me identify stressful triggers.  It has also found me reminiscing about the good old days without responsibilities, when I was footloose and fancy free and could spend months at a time chilling out in Nepal, practicing yoga, writing, drinking chai and spending a lot of time on my own in silence.  What bliss!!

These days with a partner and a 15 month old son it is a challenge to find any time to be with oneself.  Even going to the toilet I am usually accompanied by Elijah (my son!).  In fact last week he wouldn’t even let me put him on the floor, he actually sat on me on the toilet while I went for a wee, oh how life has changed!!!

Others will identify with this I know.  The other ladies on the mindfulness course and I were all reminiscing about our different times in Nepal pre-children, and that care free way of living, and yet we also recognised that much of the time spent on our own was wasted in our heads dreaming about a future (or praying for a future) of partners and children!! Oh how the human mind is always looking back to the past with longing or forward to the future with desire for how things should be different.

I also had a really interesting conversation with one of my spiritual friends about how our challenges in life change, in terms of the challenges that help us to grow and develop as compassionate, awake and spiritual beings. So that one time our challenge was to learn a new yoga pose, and another time to learn how to exist with depleted sleep and a small child depending on you for his/her survival.

There was a time where I thought I had mastered my anger and I accredited this to my yoga practice.  So it came as somewhat of a surprise when I found myself increasingly angry post Elijah – at myself (or life) not at him or anyone else for that matter, it is the anger of frustration rather than the anger of wanting to hurt someone.  I thought much of this was probably due to hormonal changes but it is only recently that I have come to realise that all that has happened is that the triggers have changed.

You see living on my own as a care free travelling yogini it was very easy to live a life of little responsibility, no one to think about other than myself, no mortgage, no work deadlines, just a lot of travelling and “me” time spent on my mat.  Those were indulgent days I now realise, very little to challenge me really apart from this niggling concern that I may not create the one thing in life my heart truly desired – meeting my life partner and having children.

Now I have those things and yet here is the anger again, reminding me of long days gone by, before I brought yoga into my life.  And it is only recently after much berating and frustration (see how we are our own worst enemies) and chats with others who have gone through the same process, that I have come to realise that the anger never went away, I just removed all triggers for it from my life. 

Now I am back living in the real world again with mortgages and deadlines and not so much “me” time, well herein lies my challenge.  Herein lies the opportunity to grow.  To make my life as stress-free as possible, to rest, to make time for me, to catch myself, to be mindful of the moment, to let go of expectation, to accept whatever is happening without wanting to change it, and just being present.  But oh so difficult!

But this is no less a spiritual way to live than by taking oneself on countless yoga retreats.  The path is simply the way. They all lead to the same destination.  We are all seeking inner peace, greater balance, harmony and compassion to self and all beings.  Some take themselves away from the real world and some throw themselves straight into it.  It fascinates me how our lives flow, how it provides opportunities for growth, how people come in and out of our life at the right time (often when we have almost lost hope), how we keep going despite life’s ups and downs.

However it also fascinates me how easily we give up on making positive and courageous changes in our lives.  On the one hand yoga and mindfulness and holistic practices are expanding at an extraordinary rate and yet I can’t help feeling that we are not actually getting anywhere with it.  On my mindfulness course there has been quite a bit of resistance and a few have dropped out, perhaps life was just too busy, but then isn’t this the point.

The same with yoga, so many times recently I have met students who tell me they would love to come to class but they are just too busy.  I think we all know deep within that we cannot continue to live like this forever, so out of touch with our bodies, with nature, with the very essence of life itself.  How many of us have time to notice the full moon, the stars shining brightly, the new buds on the trees, the subtle changes in nature from season to season.  How many of us give any concern to where our food is grown, to how it got to the shelves in the supermarket, to the impact this has had on the environment.

How many of us notice all the suffering in the world, in our rush to get to and from work, to pick up children, to manage all the things we are expected to manage today.  How many of us notice our neighbours, how many of us stop to let people cross roads, to let cars pull out of drive ways, how many of us notice the shop assistant, to look into their eyes to even be aware that they are indeed a fellow human being just trying to survive in this world, how many of us truly listen to those in our lives.

We practice yoga and then perhaps it gets a little bit too much, we don’t often like what we see, we don’t want to go that deep.  So we drop out.  Or perhaps we start doing hot yoga or something that keeps us on a level, that keeps us focused on the perfection of the body, rather than the messages the body is trying to tell us. But isn’t this just a reflection of how out of balance our lives are these days, where it is all about pushing and striving and trying to get somewhere, always doing, not so much being, and certainly not a lot of being with the self.

But aren’t we are all in some denial.  It is always so much easier to see it in someone else rather than in ourselves.  My parents recognise my denial a long time before I am able to recognise it in myself. Yet how powerful when we come to recognise a level of this denial (even if it is annoying to have to admit that they were right!).  How liberating indeed.  And this is where we find the space, the courage then, the ability to transform into a truer and more lighter being…which of course makes our life more in resonance with our truth and allows our light to shine that little bit brighter and – I hope – has a positive impact on those with whom we interact.

It is all about the practice, however that comes to be.  It is about commitment to the truth and being curious of what is in there, inside yourself.  It may mean that you find yourself in uncomfortable territory, but better to be uncomfortable in the short term, rather than spend your whole lifetime aware that something just isn’t quite right and finding yourself incapable of doing anything about it. Now that is one long lifetime of anxiety, frustration, depression and just feeling a little bit irritated. 

So if you know, if you are stressed or just too busy, just catch yourself for a moment.  Go and stand outside in the moonlight and take a deep breath in and out.  Really smell the air and feel the breath within your body.  Ask yourself why are you so busy, why?  Find yourself a yoga class and go and take some time out.  Or lie down and listen to a Yoga Nidra transcript.  And if you have one near you, sign up for a mindfulness course, and commit to it.  It really is that easy!

x

 

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Yoga Emma Despres Yoga Emma Despres

Skandasana (side Leg Stretch)

I do not know about the rest of you, but I am absolutely delighted that Spring is almost here, it feels like it has been a long time in coming with all the seemingly endless wet weather we have experienced recently.

That aside, this is most certainly one of my favourite times of year as all the new life begins to appear,  full of potential;  the brightly coloured daffodils and crocuses, the fresh buds on the trees, the baby lambs and kids and of course the evenings drawing out and more light to be enjoyed in nature, what bliss!! 

The energy is vibrant with all this new life and I am certainly keen to slow down and tap into it.  I am sure I am not alone in finding the last few months a little challenging with all he manic New Year energy and the moon shaking things up a little, to say nothing of all the dark mornings and evenings creating a feeling of heaviness and lethargy.

So here we go, Spring and the Spring Equinox are shortly upon us and with that an opportunity to embrace the lightness and balance that these both bring, appreciating the moment (slowing down see) and enlivening for the warmer and indeed lighter months ahead.  What better way to begin the process than by taking to our mats and practicing Skandasana, a favourite of mine for the benefits it offers.

Skandasana (Side Leg Stretch)

Benefits

  • Stretches and tones the hamstrings and inner thigh muscles;

  • Promotes balance and serenity;

  • The bent knee is strengthened;

  • The spine is stretched;

  • The posture opens the hips;

  • Calming for the mind;

  • Strengthens kidney energy.

Contraindications

  • None

Photography by Nick Despres, please see www.nickdespres.com

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Ross Despres Ross Despres

Being true

Sleep deprivation has taken its toll.  Fifteen months now without a whole night of sleep, without sleeping in fact for more than 4 hours between wakes.

It feels relentless at times, more so with the relentless nature of life in the office at the moment.

I have noticed how it affects my ability to think, how my memory is definitely not what it used to be, how more impatient I have become with certain things, how I react more quickly when things do not seem to be going my way and how my mood is not always as uplifted as it can be - essentially I am aware how much more stressed I am.  It is interesting, because this is the very reason I started yoga in the first place and so it is quite strange to find myself back here.

But life is a series of cycles so that we do see/feel the same things again, although I always believe we gain more awareness each time until we make the changes and begin to create new cycles of being instead.

It is all about being honest with ourselves, which is so very easy to say and not so easy to do.  It reminds me a little of something my Reiki Master said to me shortly after I began Beinspired and was trying to find my way.  She urged me to be authentic and at the time I thought I was being.

But I wasn't really I see that now.  I was trying to be how I thought I should be as a yoga teacher, so that I kept various aspects of myself hidden, even from myself.  I was ever so hard on myself, setting very high standards to try to be the person I felt I should be as a spiritually minded yoga teacher.

This meant that I felt I had to look the part so that I strictly controlled my diet and added fuel (as I later realised) to an earlier eating disorder (not healthy at all and a common trap for yoga practitioners who enjoy the fact that yoga gives them an excuse to embrace eating disorders).  I lived a very controlled life so that I shut myself away from friends and a social life (for fear of losing control) and tried to live the life I felt I should live to be more spiritual and pure, that actually made me feel very lonely and sad, rather than connected and whole.  I certainly wasn't happy on the inside, even if others thought I was from the outside.

I believe this all comes down to the mind being a powerful thing and believing we, our lives then, have to be a particular way to be something, whatever that may be. Not only that, but also how we so easily stick to the comfort in our lives, to the way things are, even if we have outgrown them. And this ties in rather nicely with this whole idea of being true to ourselves.  Being authentic thing.  Being honest.  Only that we are often so caught in our zone, routine, comfort zone, our own denial then, that we have no idea.  We don't really see what is getting under our skin, what is draining our life force and what is making our spirit sink.

Until one day something shifts, or gives, or whatever it may be, so that we realise that perhaps, just perhaps we are not being true, or real or authentic in our way of being, living, thinking. And I guess that is when the change occurs, when the cycle begins to take a new shape, as we find ourselves and our way again.

So for me now, the sleeplessness is relentless and exhausting.  But so too the life that I live, the way in which I live, with all its toing and froing and studying and working and doing and running and rushing and simply not enough pottering and being.  So it is therefore no surprise to find myself here again.

And with this a realisation that being authentic really is about being true to the self, acknowledging when things need to change and having the courage to make those changes so that the energy flows, the spirit lifts and life seems filled with more "being" again.

Hoorah therefore for the Aquarius new super moon which takes place late on Wednesday evening. This new moon is certainly making me feel a little wobbly and I shall very much look forward to it waxing and us springing forward again.  Have a read here for more on what is in store!

http://us4.campaign-archive1.com/?u=bf3182281c10722c7eea99902&id=981d30f481&e=eae0fe6be6

Be true. Be happy (as someone I met only hours earlier told me on Saturday)

With love and gratitude.

xx

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Ross Despres Ross Despres

The world needs more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers, and lovers of every kind

In the mindfulness course we are encouraged to really check in with the feeling sensations within our body as we move throughout our day, to get out of our mind, into the body and into the here and now, the present moment.

I didn't have any problem with that today.  I was consumed by an overwhelming sense of sadness that made my heart feel heavy and a sickening and sinking feeling right in the pit of my tummy.  This whole barbaric terrorism malarkey (for want of a better word) has indeed saddened and sickened me to the core of my being. What kind of world are we living in where we feel justified in inflicting so much physical, mental and emotional pain, turmoil and torture on others. 

How is it that so many of us are finding greater lightness in life and being and others just fall further into the darkness from olden times.  How can our experience of life be so different when we are all of the same heart and soul.

Probably a good time for me really to come find the following reading in my line of vision twice this week and providing much comfort to me today as I try to feel more hopeful and less hopeless about the state of this world in which we live and the way we treat others.  For where there is light goodness will come, and perhaps like everything we have to see more darkness, before we are able to see more lightness shine. 

“The plain fact is that the planet does not need more successful people. But it does desperately need more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers, and lovers of every kind. It needs people who live well in their places. It needs people of moral courage willing to join the fight to make the world habitable and humane. And these qualities have little to do with success as we have defined it.”

David W Orr.

A friend commented as Gandhi once said, that we need to be the change we want to see in the world.  So true indeed, but so challenging, because we really need to bear witness to ourselves, be mindful then, catch ourselves before we get angry with people on the roads, or feel affronted because someone pushed in a queue in front of you, or got annoyed because someone misunderstood you, or get short tempered because your partner didn't listen to you properly, or shouted at your child for ignoring you. This mindfulness course is making me aware of these interactions and reactions in my own life and teaching me to try to breathe consciously in that moment and catch myself before reacting...

So yes, we do need to be that change, little steps, towards a peaceful world one day, and it is true, it does begin with us. So let us all try and live consciously, let us unite in the light, let us practice yoga, meditate, pray, chant and do what we can to try to increase the vibration of this beautiful world and let us try to live as we would like the whole world to live,  with kindness, love and respect for one another from our whole beings - body, mind and soul.

Om shanti, shanti, shanti.

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Emma Despres Emma Despres

The journey: gratitude

For some time now I have been meaning to write a little about the concept of gratitude.  I was reminded while reading someone else's blog last week and then I keep catching a glimpse of my gratitude card so clearly I am meant to share.

You see the thing is, before I found yoga and reiki I believe I was very asleep for I had absolutely no concept of gratitude, or the power in words and thoughts and intention.  It was probably because I was a little bit too depressed to really believe I had any reason to feel any gratitude for anything. Which makes me feel a bit sad now, because isn't that the nature of depression, it makes us so dark to the world that we can see no beauty in even a flower.

Fortunately yoga and Reiki brought with them an awakening, I truly feel that I woke from a very dark slumber, so that all these words like 'gratitude' and 'blessings' and' joy' and 'beautiful' came into my world again and all of a sudden I was truly gracious for the changes that took place in my life and for the beauty of the journey that brought me to this moment with all its challenges and tribulations, yet all its awakenings, love, peace and freedom too.

I was given a card at the end of a shadow yoga class I happened upon at a healing centre in Byron Bay which said, "Gratitude turns what I have into enough and more".  This card sits in my yoga room and catches my eye regularly so that it has become a little like an affirmation.  Each day after my practice I pray and express gratitude, give thanks then, to the Divine for all the beauty in life.  Even on the dark days where the beauty is more challenging to find, for there is much to be thankful for in our lives.

And it has helped, expressing gratitude. It helps to keep you awake, trying to see the bigger picture.  It gives you perspective then.  And it is true that gratitude does indeed turn what you have into enough and more.  You only have to reflect on all those suffering in this world. We have enough.  Deep inside, we all have enough.  But some have more than others.  And here in the West, here in Guernsey, well really we are very blessed.

Recently this pome has come into my life three times, which means I am meant to take notice.  Anything that comes into your life three times is said to have come in for a reason, it is meant to catch your attention, there is a message in there somewhere.  I would like to share the poem with you, the fact you are reading this, especially if you have stumbled on this post, means something brought you here, so read carefully and see how it makes you feel:

The Journey by Mary Oliver

One day you finally knew

what you had to do, and began,

though the voices around you

kept shouting

their bad advice-

though the whole house

began to tremble

and you felt the old tug

at your ankles

"Mend my life!"

each voice cried.

But you didn't stop.

You knew what you had to do,

though the wind pried

with its stiff fingers

at the very foundations,

though their melancholy

was terrible.

It was already late

enough, and a wild night,

and the road full of fallen

branches and stones.

But little by little,

as you left their voices behind,

the stars began to burn

through the sheets of clouds,

and there was a new voice

which you slowly

recognized as your own,

that kept you company

as you strode deeper and deeper

into the world,

determined to do

the only thing you could do -

determined to save

the only life you could save".

Keep well.

With gratitude

xx

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