Back to nature on Lihou Island

Wow, what a few days it has been!  On Sunday we had the full moon, not that I felt as connected as I usually do to it, I even forgot to leave my crystals outside to cleanse!  I did pop outside before I went to bed and managed to catch a glimpse of it rising on the horizon and then during the night I was aware of its light permeating the bedroom.  I hope for brighter skies next month so I can really bathe in its light.

This week's reading from Pat at realastrologers.com makes for interesting reading! Evidently this week is the Scorpio Full Moon, which means it is the festival of Wesak, honouring the birth, death and enlightenment of the Buddha.  Wesak is a major "download" time, when a portal opens to higher consciousness.  Apparently, we are also marching towards an extraordinary alignment of the Sun, Moon, Earth and Venus on June 4th and 5th, which Pat believes will trigger a giant leap forward in human consciousness.  Wow, so that could be quite some Diamond Jubilee celebrating, and quite a Coldplay concert I shall be attending!

Evidently we have solar flares and corresponding disturbances in the Earth's magnetic field.  Pat says, "I have no idea whether this phenomenon is affecting our consciousness, but I’m fairly sure it’s having some effect. Several people I know are experiencing extreme fatigue, elevated heart rate, and hot flashes. Is it related to solar activity? In astrology, the Sun is associated with the heart, so it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that there’s a real correlation here. I just don’t know how we’d prove it to the satisfaction of medical science.

Dancing on the boundaries of parallel universes is disorienting and possibly dangerous. No one would entertain the idea of surfing the big waves before learning the basics of the sport, and yet we may be doing the spiritual equivalent. What I don’t know is whether everyone is experiencing this shift at some level, or whether those who are sensitive to these energies feel it, while those who aren’t remain blissfully ignorant. I pass no judgment on which is better. Someone has to hold down the fort while a percentage of the population stumbles around in a daze.

I strongly encourage you to keep a journal and record any strange dreams, visions, synchronicities, or other unusual events in your life. At the same time, try to stay grounded. Fortunately, the Sun and Jupiter in Taurus are helping in that regard. If you find yourself mysteriously craving meat and fattening foods, don’t fight it for now. You can take off the excess weight as soon as the cosmic dust settles. I’m definitely of a mind that we have to trust our bodies and higher minds at this point to know what’s right for us and not try to overpower them by force of intellectual beliefs. It’s a leap of faith, really."

This all makes for rather interesting reading and I was rather fortunate to spend 24 hours on Lihou from 12.30pm on Bank Holiday Monday so that I was able to ground my energy in nature and make the most of the opportunity to rest - my body is certainly crazing quiet times and lying around on my bed!

Lihou is magical.  We hired the house to celebrate E's Mum's 70th birthday, there were just four of us, including our friend Mike.  Richard, the Warden, picked us up in the tractor and drove us over the causeway, thick with seaweed on the Lihou side.  E's Mum had already walked over and was in the kitchen boiling the kettle when we arrived.  I unpacked the food and realised that we had not brought any chocolate, a bit of a disaster as far as E is concerned!  E's Mum then realised she had not brought the bottle of bubbles as she had intended, quelle horreur! 

So it was the strangest thing really.  Within minutes of our realisation, Mike presented E's Mum with a belated birthday present, of lots of bars of organic chocolate!  And then minutes later my parents arrived with scones and jam and a bottle of bubbles!  How wonderful the way the Universe helps to deliver.  We were very grateful, even if we didn't need the extra excesses!

So we sat in the warm conservatory as the weather showered and then cleared again, leaving the Island clear of visitors, put off somewhat by the rain.  It was lovely sharing tea, scones and chatter while watching all the birds outside.  I have to admit I have developed a love of birds recently.  E thinks it is rather worrying and I will turn into one of those twitching types laying low with my binoculars.  I just think it is great. 

It is another one of those weird things.  Lihou related too really, because the first time we stayed on Lihou we were fortunate to share it with the snowy owl.  And then the second time sitting in that conservatory I couldn't help becoming mesmerised by all the birds flying in front of us, like a show really, a nature show.  Since then and I can't remember how it happened but I became friends on facebook with someone who used to attend the Grammar school with me, but I doubt very much we have ever really spoken all these years, let alone at school.  In any event, I am really rather pleased as he is a bird watcher and has been posting all these wonderful photos of the recent migrating birds, so that I have become very keen to see them for myself.

So after the tea and scones, our visitors scooted back across the causeway as the tide was rising to cut us off from the mainland.  This is such a wonderful experience when you are staying on Lihou and all of a sudden have the Island to yourself, truly, for the rest of the evening and the next morning.  The weight just lifts form the shoulders - no traffic, no email, no internet, no telephone, no tv, no radio.  No contact with the outside world unless you bring your blackberry or mobile.  I just love it.  makes me realise how much all those other things simply add more stress to our lives.

We went out for a walk and were amazed by all the sea gulls nesting all around the Island.  Really incredible.  In some instances we found ourselves rather close to nests without realising we were close to nests.  The herring gulls were fine with this and we even managed to get a photo before respectfully levaing them to it.  Not so the lesser and great black-backed gulls.  Phew, that was close.  We were following the path but one of these gulls had laid just next to the path and as we got closer it got very agitated, and without much warning starting swooping at us from above, which is what they do when the nests are threatened. 

The thing was E's Mum was totally disorientated and had a gull swooping down at her as she ran closer towards the nest, without realising it.  I had retreated completely, totally scared by the whole experience.  E took control, directing his Mum away from the nest and thankfully the gull left us alone after that.  It was funny after the event, all of us running in different directions but Richard, the Warden, tells me that they do actually make contact and he has had to use his first aid on people who have ended up with a beak grazing  their head.

The island is stunning at the moment, full of sea pinks, more than Richard has noticed on the Island previously.  It just makes it seem so incredibly beautiful.  There are violets and bluebells and sea campion too.  You have to love Spring.  On our ramblings we passed shelduck (the largest duck in the world, with red markings), oystercatchers and lots of swallows and swifts.  We also came across a razorbill, dead sadly, but a razorbill nonetheless, a relatively unusual visitor to the Island, sad really. 

I missed it as I was on a marathon sleeping session, but the rest of them witnessed a marsh harrier coming down and taking an egg out of a nest with a group of seagulls going crazy overhead.  It is sad as the Societe Guernisiase are encouraging marsh harriers on the marshland at L'Eree, without perhaps considering that these harriers are popping over to Lihou for quick feed on eggs and, shortly, new chicks, and yet the Societe are also trying to encourage the breeding of more gulls.  Someone hasn't thought that through properly.

E and I managed a couple of swims.  Well the first one on the first night, at high tide not far from the house was more of a dip as the sea was full of seaweed, not so great!  The second one the next day on the low tide was at the Venus Pool, a first for me and quite refreshing jumping into that big pool of cold water!  We have been in quite a bit in May and I have to say it is really not so bad!  Aside from a bit of a ramble and those swims, I spent a lot of time sleeping and watching the birds from the conservatory - it is fascinating watching those gulls protect their eggs.

We ate dinner together in front of the wood burning stove that evening.  I prepared lots of different salad dishes so we could simply help ourselves.  It was wonderful, there is nothing better than good food and good company, and especially when you are on your own island with the background sound of the sea and the birds and the smell of seaweed! 

Needless to say none of us wanted to leave the next day,  twenty fours is not really long enough, but better than nothing.  I just felt so much more grounded and connected to nature than when I arrived, calmer therefore and lighter.  I can only imagine how you would feel spending a whole 5 days of neap tides on the Island when the causeway never clears...one day, will be much better for the environment and the soul than trekking all the way to some other secluded part of the world.  I can't wait to return in the next couple of weeks to see the hatched baby seagulls, let us hope the marsh harriers leave them alone!

Now back on Guernsey it is Liberation Day, reminding us of the sacrifices made by our ancestors so that we can continue to experience freedom today.  Of course we always have the choice to experience freedom of mind, we choose our thoughts after all, but there is a lot to be said for living with so much freedom in our lives.  With this being the time for looking forward and grounding our new year resolutions, I can't help thinking how lucky we are that these days we do have that opportunity, that we are not simply focused on surviving.  So I hope this finds you all well and happy.  Keep practising for all comes to those who practice.

With love and much gratitude.

x

May Day and Beltane

x

It was the first day of May yesterday, although of course we don't get to celebrate that until Monday over here - what a day it could be with the full moon the night before and us on Lihou. Traditionally the actual celebration took place on 30 April and is called "Beltane". This is primarily a fire and fertility festival and the time of the May Queen, when a young woman was chosen from the village to represent the Earth Goddess and reflect the transformation of maiden to mother. This was also the time of the kindling of the need fire, when all the fires in the village were extinguished and then ritually re-lit the following day. Fertility plays an important role in this festival too. The principal symbol of this Sabbat was the Maypole, also known as the axis mundi, around which the universe revolved. The pole personifies the male forcfe while the disk at the top depicts the receptive female. There were 7 ribbons ties to it, which represented the seven colours of the rainbow. Beltane is when we actively begin to pursue our goals on the material plane. Now it is the time to take action and physically put effort into the goal you began to think about at Yule. All very exciting times. Especially with the sun shining and that holiday energy starting to permeate the air!

The calm after the storm

So it seems that the storm has passed revealing calmer and brighter skies, hoorah! Wow what a weekend. I went down to Jerbourg yesterday and was blown away by all the debris, so many pine combs had fallen from the trees and still the wind was whipping around the point so the sea looked incredibly rough and uninviting. Mind you the rain has been most welcome. Indeed I can't help thinking that the April showers are an incredible invention of mother nature to help the seddlings to grow and bring more life to the landscape - it is certainly very green and lush out there at the moment and so many beautiful wild flowers, especially all the blue bells everywhere. I have finished reading Paulo Coelho's "Aleph", which was a fabulous read. Rather horrible at times, chatter of burning witches at the stake and all the terrible torture that went with that period in history. Makes me so pleased that we no longer live in such a world, at least not here in Guernsey fortunately. It is quite mad to think that there was a time when it was felt that Paganism, a belief in past lives, an interest in astrology and the mysteries of the spiritual world could result in a women being deemed a witch and literally burnt at the stake. As in other parts of Europe, Guernsey is steeped in legend and witchcraft was believed to be rife in the Middle Ages. Guernsey convicted on average one witch a year for 150 years and one Bailiff, the feared Amice de Carteret, was responsible for sending 35 women to their death in a thirty five year period up to 1635. In 1640 a woman said to be 80 years old was burned at the stake. The last witch trial in Guernsey was as recently as 1914, but the sentence thankfully was eight days hard labour. The belief in witchcraft was very strong over here - the white witches who helped other people and the black witches who cast nasty spells on people. At one point it was considered unlucky not to have ledges built into the chimney stack of a house. Here, passing witches could rest on their travels and you can still see such ledges on old Guernsey farmhouses - in fact the best-known example of such a ledge can be seen at the Longfrie Hotel in St Peter’s. I met a Guernsey lady living in Australia who had left the Island as soon as she was able. She still visits family here from time to time but I remember her saying to me that she never feels comfortable on the Island, and there are some sreas of town she has to avoid simply because they bring back some memory in her as being persecuted as a witch in a previous life. It sounds ridiculous perhaps because witches don't always look like the stereotype, but there was something about this lady that made you in no doubt that she had been a witch in a previous life - a white witch no-less. It makes me think how many of us would be burned at the stake these days simply for believing in the healing power of nature, for celebrating the full moon, for taking herbal supplements and for indulging in an esoteric Yoga practice!! Thankfully the consciousness of society has increased considerably since then. So Paulo's book had quite an impact on me and I am still digesting the historical content. On a lighter note, E and I managed a walk around Petit Bot the other day - it ws truly stunning, well worth a trip out to the Cliffs this weekend if you get the chance. I am hoping to get back into the greenhouse now we don't have to fear the glass panes falling on top of us with all that wind! plus we are booked to stay in Lihou on Monday night which is so exciting, I do love that little Island - regardless of its darker association with the whole back witch-ing days! It is a full moon this weekend too, so let us hope the skies are bright and we are able to bathe in its energy and give thanks to the Goddess without fear of being arrested, tortured and then burnt at the stake! With gratitude. xx

Becoming unstuck

Well we are certainly experiencing the April showers, cleansing somehow, a transition period to the lighter and indeed warmer days ahead (we can hope!).

It has been profound for me in many ways. I have been feeling spiritually stuck for some time now, not a great feeling, but a necessary one perhaps nonetheless, when you just feel like everything is the same, and you just know that something has gotten stuck inside.

I have started having Reiki for that very reason. For me Reiki is incredible in helping to remove blocks that prevent us from experiencing our true light. For me Reiki always helps to bring the old stuck stuff to the surface, where it is temporarily re-lived and the it goes. Of course the process is not always comfortable. Often you do literally get to re-live those old stuck emotions. So, for example, I have had had to re-live a day of complete insecurity, another of emotional instability with lots of tears, another of anger, and that wonderful frustration!

This is often called a healing crisis, when things get worse before they get better. It would be very easy to get scared by the process and decide that the Reiki is not working, only making you feel worse. But sometimes we have to feel worse to feel better in the long run. But the uncomfortable feelings that come from a healing crisis can often put us off taking the healing any further.

The healing can show up all over the body. I have developed sore patches on my face as the old literally weeps out of me. And then there are the vivid dreams where people from my past appear and I wake up more tired than when I went to bed the night before. Still, it is out. That is the most important thing. I guess it follows the understanding that by letting go of the old stuff, there is room for new stuff to enter. Essentially you can't bring in new stuff to your life, if you are filled with old stuff inside, there just isn't the room.

There is this wonderful quote - if we always do what we have always done, then we will always get, what we have always got.

The wonderful apse ct - for me - of working with Reiki is that it gets things flowing again. It helps to raise the vibration in the body so that you do feel lighter as all that old heavy stuff leaves the vibrational body. You start to feel more connected to the spiritual world somehow, that parallel universe that is beyond time and space.

It has been profound. While that parallel universe has always been there, sometimes it is difficult to feel a connection. The signs are still there, the miracles are still happening and the angels are still trying to nudge us on our path, but we don't notice, we have shut down somehow. Still after a few Reiki treatments, I felt connected again, things have happened, there have been quite a few coincidences, which aren't coincidences at all. Essentially, it is all about divine timing, as the angels have been trying to tell me recently.

I was fortunate to attend a chanting class on Saturday here in Guernsey. I have chanted quite a lot in the past, I have some special memories of chanting with Devika in her Yoga space in Nepal, first thing in the morning, both of us singing along to the mantras sung by the beautiful Deva Premal. The air is clearer and the vibration stronger first thing in the morning and there has always been something quite incredible about the early morning energy in Nepal what with all those mountains and the Himalayan connection to Shiva and the divine.

But here in Guernsey, chanting still has so much stigma attached to it. I have held chanting classes and even incorporated a class in my earlier Yoga & Wellbeing weekend on Herm, plus some one off sessions on a Sunday morning in the St Peter's community hall, but in general classes people often feel confronted by the idea of chanting and even chanting "Om" is too much for some.

It is a shame because chanting is powerful. It stirs something deep inside, the words have a magic of themselves, and the effect on our bodies is quite profound. Essentially the Sanskrit word mantra can be translated as "the force that liberates the mind". A mantra is a scared sound. It may be an entire phrase, a single word, or even a syllable. Mantras are considered to be ancient sounds that express feelings rather than concepts, emotions rather than ideas. It is said that mantras originated in the birth of language itself, and when you chant a mantra, you are chanting sounds that come from the source of all life itself. There is this wonderful quote:-

"This sound is the source of all manifestation...The knower of the mystery of sound knows the mystery of the whole universe" (Sufi Hazrat Inayat Khan).

Regardless of the theory, from experience, I can safely say that chanting really does help to raise the vibration in the body, helps to clear energetic blocks, and helps to assist in entering a meditative state. The class on Saturday was great. Not only did we learn how to pronounce the Sanskrit in its perfect way, but we got to join with others to share the energy. I am really grateful to Michael for organising the session and helping to remind me how wonderful it makes one feel.

That evening I started reading a new book that I had ordered from Amazon a few weeks ago and had only just arrived. It reminded me of that sense of everything being divinely timed. if it had arrived just after I had ordered it then I am sure the messages would have been lost, the timing would have been wrong. It is Paolo Coelho's new book, "Aleph", which spoke to me from the first page. He too was suffering from a spiritual stuckness, where he felt disconnected from the spiritual world, stuck in the routine of the mundane world.

He began a journey, a physical one, as the pilgrim he is, to bring him back to himself, to his light again. So his journey continues to talk to me, for while I have not disappeared to Nepal to seek the light again as I would have done previously, I have still been fortunate to feel the light returning once more and the messages and the signs were obvious for a few days.

In fact I had to laugh. On Sunday morning I attended a Yoga therapy course about Yoga and the back with a yoga therapy teacher from the UK. This was great. Lots of slow movement to seek release through the back (through the spine therefore, the conduit of all that prana) coupled with chanting "Om" on the exhalation. So again more chanting in my life and "om" of course is widely considered to be the most powerful of all mantras.

In any event I left that class floating and feeling ridiculously tired. I have been ignoring the signs for a while - the ones that ask me to soften, to rest and to let things happen, rather than the constant pushing and effort that goes with trying to make things happen when the time is not right. There is a certain quality that comes from having patience and waiting for life to unfold and opportunities to present themselves - think divine timing and also the Oak tree, how it grows in its own time, it wouldn't have the energy to constantly grow, it needs to take time to rest too.

So there was a lesson hammered home and believe you me, I have been trying to learn this lesson for the last 2 years since I suffered adrenal exhaustion from simply doing too much. It makes me chuckle to think that I have been resisting for so long, caught in the same mental groove over and over again.

In any event later that evening having spent an hour that afternoon lying on the sofa reading Paolo's book, I begrudgingly joined E and our friend Chris to watch a DVD. I was expecting it to be either violent or adrenally exhausting, hence my reticence just before bed on a Sunday evening. However it was quite amazing as it had a spiritual undertone that showed a guy in prison discovering a spirituality that focused on chanting to heal the soul. He went through quite a transition to find his light again and while all the other main characters lost their own light a little, he grew and moved his life on upon release from prison.

It made me laugh. It was a totally random choice but I couldn't help thinking of the coincidence, that chanting has certainly come back into my life, and with that a renewed sense of faith and spirit. It reminded me that the signs are everywhere, if only we can see them. The miracles too. We just have to have the courage to go let go.

On another note our poor little white nectarine and peach trees have black fly. Nasty things. Mum and I spent an hour on Sunday afternoon picking off the bad leaves and using an organic spray to deter the black fly from spreading even further. We planted more seeds so we have quite a nursery now. And back here at home E and I have been planting more flowers in the garden and he has been adding to our trees too. I guess we are trying to do our bit to bring more life into this world and more healing vibrational energy too.

So let us see what this week offers, another Reiki session and more Yoga classes.

With love, light and gratitude

xx

Coming back to earth (and the body)

Ah and finally the rain has arrived, about time, nothing quite so cleansing for the energy and also energising for the earth, which needs it, desperately.

Thankfully the rain held off over the weekend and while it may have been a little fresher than I would have liked, it was still glorious with the sunshine filling the skies.

On Saturday I helped to rake over the rotivated beds in the greenhouse and plant out some of the seedlings, so now we have tomatoes and squash, courgettes and more squash in the ground! We planted out more seeds too, a variety of herbs, as well as some squash and passion fruit seeds we brought all the way back from Byron Bay.


On Sunday E and I joined the rest of the group for the second training session for the forthcoming Three Peaks challenge. This time we met at the Bathing Pools and walked to Saints Bay along the cliffs and then back to the Bathing Pools via all the green lanes. What a stunning and indeed energising way to begin a Sunday. The blue bells are out in force along the cliff paths and while blue bell woods is not yet as stunning as other years, it still makes for a lovely walking experience.

The sea looked crystal clear from above and in the sheltered spots, where the sun made us feel rather warm, it actually looked inviting. Still I know from my brief swim at Vazon with E on Friday that it is anything but inviting once you stick a toe in the water, let alone submerge the rest of your body (it certainly work us up!). Still I couldn't help being reminded, once again (post holiday blues and all that) that we live on a fantastically beautiful little Island.


I particularly enjoyed walking through the woods around Fermain. There is something special about being in woodland. I guess it is the energy; the soft earth under foot, the way the sunlight dapples its way through the trees, the soft sounds of nature, and the sense of being far away from anything else, and totally conscious of the moment. It is an incredibly healing environment, a perfect place to sit under a tree and allow the worries of the world to soften away from the shoulders where they usually sit.

Yesterday I helped Mum plant out the outdoor seedlings in the outdoor raised beds that my Dad has lovingly made for us this year. We planted broccoli and purple sprouting, sprouts and artichokes, more courgettes and squash. We potted more seeds and went to the gardening centre to invest in a few more. I bought some seeds for the garden here too; this seed planting gets all a little addictive - it just blows my mind how they just grown, knowing what to do all on their own, obviously with the help of some heat, soil and water!


I have been reading quite a few Yoga texts this weekend. There was a wonderful article in one of the Yoga Therapy magazines about the recent publicity surrounding the dark side of Yoga (known now as the Great Yoga Debate). It is a fantastic article, written by Jill Miller, and I would like to share extracts of it with you, as it may resonate, as it did for me, especially as a teacher watching people push themselves into poses, because they think they should be doing them (and as a practitioner too, and falling into that trap myself in my earlier days and damaging my neck in the process):-

"I remember working with one student who had multiple disc bulges in her neck and experienced shooting pains when turning her head, yet she insisted that her practice of shoulderstand had not created or exacerbated the problem. The pose is often touted as the "queen of all asana" and it is a goal for many practitioners. The challenge with the pose is that very few humans have the off-the-charts range of motion and strength to be able to do it safely. Some people are able to practice this pose with sufficient props - but even then it is still not advise able for some people due to the pressure it creates on the cervical spine. Shoudlerstands can create a host of issues in the neck vertebrae and discs, as well as in the shoulder joints and ribs. The damage doesn't always show up overnight, but the repetition of poor form or one's body just not being suited to a particular pose can do massive damage over time, which was the case with this student...

...Sometimes there is a disconnect in the body between what we are doing and what the physical actions are doing to us. This student believed that shoulderstand was a healing pose; all the literature declared it so, but ultimately it was not an appropriate pose for her because of her body's specific architecture. Unfortunately she was not able to feel the negative effects that were building up in her body". How is this possible? Blame it on faulty proprioception.

Proprioception is defined as "a body's sense of itself in space". In order to prevent injury in our practice, we need to keenly pay attention to our body-sense to better assess where our body's joints and soft tissues are within a pose; in other words increasing our body's ability to propriocept. The brain calculates millions of sensory impulses every minute; some of these sensations are brought to conscious awareness, but most of the time our minds are too busy to notice each and every sensation. We can also "numb out" our own sensory feedback loops by over stretching nerves and thus easily "blow past" a safe end-range. Each time you unwittingly exceed your body's specific range of motion, micro-damage can occur in the soft-tissue level - until one day you hear a loud pop in your hamstring or feel a searing explosion of pain in your neck or lower back".
So if anything, this article helps to acknowledge that the recent bad press is okay, because it is simply a call for more awareness, a moment of reflection for teachers and students. It simply encourages us to acknowledge that there is a grey area in Yoga, like there is in every aspect of life, an area where we must be willing to face the intricacies of both our practice and our bodies - and in the process become more self-aware, which is what Yoga helps us to do anyway. And with more awareness we can become more conscious of behaviour patterns in our physical, mental and emotional bodies, partciurlalry those that no longer serve us.

I am really passionate about this at the moment. The manner in which both Yoga and Reiki can help to transform us back to our trueness. How they help to strip away the layers of denial and resistance, of the armour we have created to protect the core of our very being. It is never easy coming face to face with yourself. but with courage and commitment, we can truly use our practice to let go of the years of conditioning and all that other stuff that often holds us back from living the life we truly desire and indeed deserve, and yet helps us to appreciate what we have and be quietly accepting of the moment.

I am re-reading Cyndi Lee's book at the moment. She is my favourite Yoga teacher and I could quite easily quote all she says to share with you here. But last night I read the following that just says it so much better than I can hope to say it, "When we practice asanas, we fold over, twist, turn upside down and inside out, place our body in specific shapes and stay there. During this process of re patterning our nervous system and reopening our pranic thoroughfares, we look to our breath and our mind for feedback on how we are doing on the tightrope of not too tight and not too loose. Throughout all this movement, we never leave our mat. We never go anywhere, except towards a recognition of who we are, starting with a deeper understanding of how we relate to our own body."

And again, "Many people think of Yoga as just stretching. But if we only try to get bigger and go out, out, out, it would be like taking a huge breath in...and never exhaling. That;s not stretching, that is grasping. Without a connection to the breath, Yoga is just a series of frozen shapes that solidify whatever opinions we already have about who we are and what our bodies do.

With proper understanding and a little pranayama practice under your belt, the rhythm of breathing in and out can be your guide as you begin to learn or deepen your Yoga practice. Eventually it will become a seamless process of extending and gathering, of falling back to centre and radiating out, over and over again. When we experience this natural sway in our body, mind, and breath, we begin to feel a connection to the changing seasons, the movements of night and day, the flow of the tides, and the heartbeat of all beings. We begin to make Yoga - union - with everything and everybody. When we can do this we will begin to experience an even greater sense of balance between the three aspects of our being - body, breath, and mind".

The key is to practice, practice, practice.

And enjoy your life.

On that note, time to go and practice on the mat!

With love and gratitude to all my teachers, in whatever form.

Om Namah Shivaya

x

From the air to the earth again

I admit it; I have been experiencing the post-holiday blues this week! Long haul travel doesn't help of course, there is always a sense that some part of your energy body has been left behind and another part is still hanging up in the air somewhere, leaving you feeling a touch disjointed and uncentred; a part of you here and a part of you there.

It has been good to get back to teaching though, albeit that the classes feel so short in comparison to the 2 hour classes back in Byron where you have ample time to lull around on your mat and drift off into a deep relaxation at the end. Still, live is busy over here, and whatever time we can spare for a Yoga practice can still makes a difference.

While the sun has blessed us with shining skies, I have been finding it rather cold, and it appears to be getting even colder over the next few days. This is our excuse for shying away from the sea since our return, although it has looked tempting driving into work with the tide high and the sun above, we are lucky to have such a pretty town sea front. Maybe today...no doubt it will be quite a shock after the temperature of the sea in Byron; good for the soul nonetheless.

Moving out of winter and into Spring has made me very aware how hard we can get during the winter months and I was fascinated to receive a newsletter from a fellow Phoenix Rising Yoga therapist in New York, whose thoughts echo my own. A theme that keeps appearing in her life is one of being gentle. Strangely, or not as the case may be, this is a theme that has been popping up in my life quite a bit recently. Not least a reminder from friends and family, but also the inner voice, that I am so good at ignoring as I continue in the habitual way of being (my shadow side).

I am reminded of Patanjali's sutra 2.46 sthira sukham asanam "asana is a steady and comfortable posture". In this regard there should be no gripping or tension or pushing or grasping. Asanas are a balance of strength and sweetness, establishing your foundation and with it a lightness, be that in Warrior 2 or in child's pose. I admit that my recent Yogic experiences in Byron, the dynamic form which inspired me to initially undertake my teacher training, have encouraged a sense of hardening, a bias towards the Yang aspects of an asana practice, masculine and strengthening.

Not that this is a negative per se. Only that there needs to be some balance and sadly Lance was so passionate about squeezing in as much asana and pranayama as he could into those 2 hour classes, that there was little time left for any relaxation - which would of course soften the Yang aspect of the physical practice. Still it is good to experience the extremes, not least to recognise - as a teacher - the importance of true relaxation in a Yoga class and life generally, but also to be reminded of one's own tendencies and how the way we practice on a mat, is often a reflection of the way we live our lives. Thus if we want to soften our lives, we need to soften our practice.

Going to one extreme, is not necessarily a negative thing either. I like to think of the pendulum. If it swings excessively one way, it will swing excessively the other way so we can find our balance again. I guess the more experienced we become at recognising the extremes in our life, the more easily we can catch ourselves before they become exactly that. In theory. Often we need reminders, as I have been reminded recently and hence the mad swinging!

So back in Guernsey, it is perhaps no surprise that I have been drawn to a much gentler practice than I have followed for some time. I have been sitting more than usual in my daily practice and hanging out in inward forward bends, and listening to a Yoga Nidra transcript to help to take me deeper inside, to truly relax and nourish and let go of that stuff no longing serving me. What a relief to finally let go and give in, rather than fightening and resisting.

It blows my mind how this Universe works. That we are always given what we need in that moment. The Yoga Nidra, for example, has been on my mind of a while, the draw to rest this way more regularly, not least for its transformative potential, but also the healing it offers(although you could argue that you can't have one without the other). Plus of course taking on board all the reminders out there to calm down a little, especially after the craziness of activity in Byron.

Then lo and behold at the airport in Brisbane aqs we were leaving Australia, I came across the Australian Yoga journal with a CD attached to the front, strangely from the Byron Yoga Centre, which essentially started me on my Australian Yoga journey. It seems that John is destined to come in and out of my life because now, in the comfort of my own Yoga room, I can hear his voice leading me through a gentle asana practice. Furthermore the voice of Leila, a Hare Krishna friend who I initially met at Govinda Valley, a spiritual retreat centre near Sydney, some 6 years ago, who was instrumental in introducing me to the joy of Bhakti Yoga, now soothes me into an alpha state of being in her beautifully led Yoga Nidra.

There has been other stuff too. Like me resisting the need to be still. And wanting change but forgetting that for change to happen on the outside it has to happen on the inside first. And of course that wonderful quote that if we always do what we have always done then we will always get what we have always gotten. It is all about a softening. And taking each day as it comes.

Perhaps not surprising, whe my spirit is low and I know I need to take action in some way or form, I have been drawn to Reiki this week. Not only re-reading my old course material because I find that each time you read such literature it means something different, I guess your perspective changes and essentially you wake up a little more. But also to receive Reiki myself. I give myself Reiki of course, but there is nothing quite as wonderful as having someone else channel you Reiki for an hour or so. I have been fortunate to finally find a practitioner over here with whom I resonate - well actually truth be told she found me and I am eternally grateful for her following her intuition on that one.

I had a session yesterday and it was lovely. Like I say I believe that when you have been travelling long haul, a part of your energy body gets left up in the air, and my feet certainly sucked in the energy to ground and center me back together again. It was, however, profound on other levels too. Not least that I have had a few twinges with my left knee recently, I can read into this emotionally/mentally, but I do believe there was some issue on a purely physical level too. Jo kept her hand on my knee for at least 10 minutes and aside from the burning heat, it actually felt like my knee was repairing itself, it was the strangest sensation and a massive reminder that Reiki really does promote our body's own healing process.

Plus the general heat and the aching in my right foot, which Jo picked up and fed back to me after the session. I can relate to that too, on some level, it really is mind blowing the intuitive nature of Reiki. I am really very thankful to you Jo and look forward to the next session!

I slept so well last night, albeit lots of mad and random dreams of people and situations that have clearly rested heavily on me. It was like the Reiki helped to work them through, from the body, from the mind, so that I feel lighter as a result, no longer carrying that "baggage" along. Plus of course I feel a softening, or at least a realisation of the resistance I have been experiencing to this concept of resting - going through the motions yes, but on the other hand thinking about all the activity I should be doing next. Now I am conscious of this habitual way of thinking, it should be easier to let go of it. Phew.

Actually (and again I am reminded of the coincidence, or not, in terms of how this Universe works) I was reading an article in a Yoga magazine last nigh, which kind of touched on this. It is called "Me and my shadow - shine a light on the dark side of yourself to discover your negative tendencies and change them". Essentially the shadow includes all aspects of your psyche that you prefer not to look at, the traits you have been ashamed of all your life and the things about yourself that you keep in the psychic basement. They tend to be hidden from our conscious awareness and will drive our emotions and behaviours in unpredictable ways.

In fact the unconscious shadow attitudes become the lens through which we look at life. Refusing to "own" a shadow tendency just makes us less conscious that it is distorting our perspective. When we can't see something in ourselves, we inevitably project the quality onto someone else, either judging or admiring that quality in them. Learning to recognise our shadow can transform our relationship to other people and ourselves. You'll have an easier time accepting constructive feedback once you have recognised that your perfectionist inner critique (I know this one well!!) is the one who is beating you up and not the person who's trying to give you a useful critique.

What is really interesting is that making friends with your shadow helps you to dissolve many of the negative feelings you have about yourself, such as feelings of shame and unworthiness, or the sneaking suspicion that you are not the person you pretend to be. It also helps you to let go og unconscious behaviour patterns like blowing up at your mother and other family members, choosing romantic partners who tend to take advantage of you and being deceitful with co-workers.

To resolve the polarised opposites within ourselves we need to shine non-judgemental, conscious awareness on to our shadow. A good place to start is considering the traits for which people generally critise you. It is also important to notice an encounter that leaves us feeling emotionally charged. As we start to look closely at the hidden Shadow feelings they begin to lose their charge and power over us.

Essentially it is about recognising this side to ourselves, without judgement - sounds so much easier than it is, because we tend to be our own worst enemy, beating ourselves up constantly. Imagine how light we would feel if we didn't have the inner critique berating our every move! Oh what a joyous world it would be! Still bit by bit, by witnessing both the light and dark aspects to ourselves, our awareness will allow both sides to integrate, releasing the energy that has been tied up in privileging one side over the other.

I find it all rather fascinating. I am sure you have had the experience of someone else projecting their "stuff" on to you. Essentially blaming you for the way they feel, blaming you for what you haven't done, which has left them feeling as they do. And of course I am quite sure we do it to people too. It is all about becoming more conscious. And that is where Yoga, meditation, Reiki etc can really help. They help to make us more conscious of ourselves, warts and all. The key is not to berate ourselves for the side that we don't like so much and to give in to ourselves.

Another prfound thing to hit me this week was re-reading a chapter of the wonderful Cyndi Lee's Yoga book where it talked about the heart. To quote, "Well known Yoga teacher Rodney Yee once asked a class, "If you could hold your heart in your hands, how would you hold it?" Ask yourself how you hold it now: tighly, tenderly, firmly and gently, carefully and attentively?"

That really made me think. Not only again in terms of how we are our own worst enermy and how we think we are being kind to ourselves - sitting in meditation, practising Yoga, eating well - that it is our thoughts about ourselves that can create so much harm. And how do we hold our hearts. Do we truly nourish them and hold them as gently as we would if they were in our own hands.

So you see it has been a week of revelations and realisation for me, probably the effect of all those Yoga classes seeking integration...quite a relief to begin the process, often I can get stuck in a depression, suffocating my soul by not allowing it the space to grow by staying stuck in the habits and condition of the mind. It is all about letting go and following the intution to enable that to happen, be that different from last time or the time before that.

Anyhow enough of my waffle. Be kind to thyself is the motto for the weekend and on that note I am off to work in the greenhouse, ground myself a little bit more back to this earth.

With much gratitude.

xx

Our last few days of Oz and onto Singapore

Our last day in Byron coincided with my parents' Ruby Wedding Anniversary - congratulations! The day dawned bright and sunny and we headed to Brunswick for an hour on the beach with Star and Willow, Ross having returned to work in Brisbane. It is a lovely little spot and we enjoyed the sunshine and the calm bay to swim.

In the afternoon E and I escaped from the sun and treated ourselves to a wonderful Thai oil massage. Ah the bliss of having the knots worked from your shoulders and neck with some Thai lady's elbow joint! And there were certainly a few of them to work through!

Town was busy as people started to move in for the annual and indeed legendary 5 day Bluefest plus of course the Easter holidays. Crazy indeed, especially with the sunshine and all that heat. It was definitely time to be leaving town, even Ross, Star and Willow were heading down the coast for the Easter break.


That evening Mum and Dad treated us all to a marvellous meal at a reputable fish cafe in town. Ross had driven back from Brisbane for the evening so the eight of us were able to spend the evening together, treated to a bright sky of stars and a building moon on the way home. Thank you Mum and Dad, a wonderful day and special final meal together.

The next day after emotional farewells - they are always in my heart and this operates beyond time and space, but all the same...- E and I headed up to Ipswich, an hour from Brisbane, to visit one of E's friends, Clive, from his days at agricultural college.



Clive is quite a guy, really into the outdoors and wildlife. Within 5 minutes of being at his house I tried not to watch him feeding a live grasshopper to a baby bearded dragon that lives in his garden. Minutes later he had E holding an adult bearded dragon for camera. I could not be pushed on the matter. No way.


Ipswich saw some of the worst flooding in the Brisbane floods last year and we went for a drive to gain some understanding of the height of the river and the way the landscape has repaired itself since then. really quite unbelievable and a fabulous landscape. We saw pelicans, water turtles, a Kite, hundreds of other birds and people fishing in the river. A magical light and the moon rising in the distance.


That evening we sat outside in his tropical garden surrounded by all the wonderful tropical vegetation, so alive with prana that you can't help but feel alive yourself. Clive baked us fish on the chineya (no idea how you spell that), with the sound of the tree frogs in the background and the starts shining overhead. Bliss. I just love the climate of this part of Australia, to say nothing of the landscape, attitude to life and feeling it creates deep inside. Bliss.

The next morning E got the fright of his life when he discovered a tree fog staring up at him in the toilet. Clive checked out the other toilet and found 2. All alive of course, this is just what they do. So I got to see them up really close and they are beautiful things, the green is so green it is almost unreal and they have these incredible feet.


Thank you Clive for a wonderful stay, albeit brief, but enlightening and inspiring all the same. You are a very generous and thoughtful host (aside from the grasshopper bit of course!)

We flew out to Singapore later that day, blown away by the humidity upon arrival, standing as we were on the equator by then. Phew! E was feeling the effects of all the travel so it was a quite night for us and a quiet next morning. In fact regardless of E's need to sleep, we got to experience our first tropical storm for some time as the thunder rumbled through the city and the fork lightening was striking overhead and the heaven's opened with this massive rain.


In the afternoon we headed out into the humid heat - great for the skin I have decided what with all that sweating! We walked along Orchard Road, the Oxford Street of sorts of Singapore. From there we headed to the Botanical gardens, which are a little overwhelming in their splendour and size. There is a healing are where they present all the tropical plants that can help us to heal. Fascinating, there I was assuming it would simply be an area to chill out, but of course you could do this anywhere, not for the first time this holiday i was very aware how healing and calming spending time in nature like this can be for the soul and the mind.


We made the obligatory trip to Raffles, the infamous Long Bar, and spent a small fortune on a drink. Why oh why do we do this to ourselves! We got to see the new hotel built over there, it cost $2 million to build apparently, a pretty amazing design but oh so much money on a building! We walked along the river bank at Boat Quay and Clarke's Quay, full of people enjoying the early evening vibe on the Bank Holiday weekend. We ate food in Chinatown before the need or sleep kicked in, this travelling really takes it out of me these days!



On our last day in Singapore we spent the morning lazing by the pool at the hotel, very decadent, but necessary as the traveling caught up with us, plus I was reading this really good book that I had not been able to put down properly since I had bought it at Brisbane Airport - "The Help" for anyone needing a good read. In the afternoon we took the MTR to the Harbour and took the cable car over to Sentosa Island, so much fun. It is a theme park I guess, but also a place to access the beach and the most southerly point of South Eastern Asia.

It was seriously hot with the sun beating down overhead and this overwhelming humidity and so we headed straight for the beach and lulled around in the salty and indeed warm sea until eventually it clouded over and cooled down a little. We took a ride up the tower to the highest viewpoint in Singapore, which showed incredible views over the harbour and our to sea, what with all the container vessels and tankers, totally mind blowing how much goes on over there in the shipping industry.


E signed us into this 3D log ride experience. And quite an experience it was. i used to love that kind of thing with the adrenalin running and feeling like you are on a roller coater, but for some reason they just make me feel sick these days, must be something to do with balance and the Yoga or something. Or it could be age. regardless I clung to E and was very pleased when it had all finished!

Sentosa is a fabulous way to spend the afternoon if you are that way inclined, E figures he could probably spend a few days there actually! We took the cable car back to the mainland and went for tea at one of the further stations. And that is when the heaven's opened and it rained like I have never seen rain before, even in Kathmandu I don't remember it being as full on as the Singapore experience. A few seconds spent crossing a road and I was soaked. I understand the reason so much of their life happens in malls inside safe and sound and air conditioned!



We enjoyed a final meal in a local food hall before heading back to the hotel and sorting ourselves out before getting a taxi to the rather impressive Singapore airport. Wow. now that is some airport, they even have a swimming pool and gym. Great stuff!

So we are now back in Guernsey dealing with the tiredness of the travel and the jet lag as our time zone has shifted again. Still all good fun, all good things must come to an end and new beginnings ahead.

Happy times. Fantastic memories. And more to come no doubt.

With much gratitude and love.

xxxx

Climbing mountains on and off the mat

What a fantastic time we have been having here in Byron Bay, so blessed in so many ways, albeit totally action packed, I shall be returning home for a rest!

On Sunday morning E and I met my wonderful friend Chris at the beach for the weekly Bay Swim. I have not seen Chris for about 5 years but it feels only like yesterday. I met her on my Yoga teacher training course here in Byron and she was a true inspiration - in her 60s and here she was facing her fears on the teacher training course and doing handstands against the wall.


Chris and her husband, Nev, are active people and have spent their retirement running 4 acres of land in Newybar, up in the hills behind Byron, growing and producing coffee as well as growing custard apples, pumpkins, beans, passion fruit, avocados, tomatoes and a variety of herbs and flowers and plants. It is a wonderful place.


The Bay swim is quite cool. You meet at main beach and walk the 20 minutes or so to the Pass, further along the beach, and from there you swim all the way back to shore. We cheated a little and didn't make it quite to the Pass and so it ended up taking us only 30 minutes to swim back to the start, still quite a feat, wonderful views with the mountains and hills in the distance and the sun shining down, surfers in the water and lots of swimmers too.

We joined Mum and Dad and followed Chris up to her property. Stunning. Just so tranquil and full of energy. We sat and chatted over coffee and tea and cake, before taking a look around their property and meeting their woofer, who has developed a nursery for them. I love it, we were all truly inspired, so much work and so much life. Yoga in action you could say. Thank you Chris.



In the afternoon we headed to the Sunday market, this time in Byron. Sadly I only had about 30 minutes before I was due to meet Ross so I didn't get to truly immerse myself in the market vibe and potter around all the stalls taking in the plethora of crystals and books and soaps and funky clothes as I would ordinarily do at the market each week! Still Ross and I chatted over chai at the chai tent where the drumming takes place, rather loud, either I have changed or there are more people drumming these days! All good fun.



Star's folks have been in town the last few days to meet my parents and enjoy a few meals together. We went to the lovely Harvester cafe on Saturday, up in Newrybar, it was raining so was well timed to sit inside for a few hours over lunch. And then last night a family meal together at the villa, good to meet everyone and spend more time with Star, Ross and Willow. Early nights all around out here, the birds are awake and singing loudly with the dawn at 5am-ish, no such thing as a holiday lie in here!

Today we have been totally action packed and I am rather tired! It started with another Lance class at 7am. He decided to run an additional two classes this week before he goes to China to teach. I will admit that Mum and I were in two minds as to whether to go or not, I guess on some level we must have had an inkling that it was going to be a strong class. Reminiscent of my teacher training course his intention for the class was to take us out of our comfort zone.


Oh yes, what fun. It was hardcore, very yang, lots of strengthening standing poses to work into the hips and more specific juicy hip poses, wow, taking us deep. We prepared for Padmasana and a sequence in the pose, hard core it has to be said, and certainly taking people out of their comfort zones. In one of the standing, hip opening poses, Mum lost her balance and whacked me on the bum, all very entertaining, a release of sorts, we got the giggles, better that than crying with the intensity of the pose!

We finished up in Kurmasana, the tortoise pose, and I got taken out of my comfort zone good and proper as Lance helped me into Supta Kurmasana, binding my hands behind my back and crossing my ankles behind my head and then sitting me up on my sitting bones for all to see. I tell you, that was a present moment experience, totally tuning in, conscious of the space for injury, and yet having total faith in Lance and his adjusting ability. We Sat straight after and I was aware of the energy circulating around my throat chakra, it was fairly full on. An incredible experience in the energy of the poses and how they make you feel.

I admit we were tired after the class. Two full hours of Yoga with some breathing at the start and at the end, but no time for relaxation as we had to leave immediately after the class. However, while it was physically demanding, I thought of nothing else during the class, I was very present. I guess that is the reason I have always enjoyed Lance's classes so much, they may be strong and Yoga, but they are engaging and help the mind to focus on the moment and the awareness to spread throughout the body, active and awake throughout.

However not the best timing for a hard core class because E and I had planned a trip to Mount Warning thereafter. We bought breakfast at this wonderful bakery in Suffolk Park and fuelled with tea before taking off in the car. It took us about an hour to drive to the foot of Mount Warning through marvellous lush terrain, green everywhere, really very beautiful, I do love the landscape out here.


Mount Warning straddles the Queensland border and offers a remarkable volcanic landscape of which it is the crown. Out of respect fort the Bundjalung law and culture the Bundjalung ask that people consider not climbing "Wollumbin" as it is known. However it is still popular with walkers as it offers stunning views of the entire area.

It was hard work. Walking through sub tropical rainforest with these amazing trees, some of them absolutely huge and these incredible vines made with the birds singing loudly in the background made for a very grounding walking experience. I admit I was paranoid about both leeches and ticks, but thankfully the terrain was not as wet as it could have been.



We had been following the path uphill for an hour when we reached the tricky part of the climb to the top as we were faced with a 60 degree cliff face ascent with a chain to help you pull yourself up the last 15 minutes or so to the top. I was so tired by then that I actually decided it was all far too dangerous and I wasn't prepared to go any further. I had a bit of a strop. However E talked me around and we continued all the way, pulling ourselves to the top. Thank you E. The views were rather cool, albeit a little misty but still we could see Byron in the distance down the coast and Surfer's Paradise up the coast the other way.




We virtually ran back down, taking us 55 minutes this time. It was a relief to reach the car and sit and rest the legs, phew it is hard work this mountain climbing in the heat!! Still I am so pleased we finally did it, I have been visiting Byron for so many years and never gotten around to visiting, well worth the effort and very much looking forward to the Three Peaks back home in the UK in the summer. It leaves you feeling that you have achieved something, and it is great to sit at the top and enjoy the peace and freedom.

We pottered around the area visiting Murwillumbah where I did my massage therapy training 5 years ago now, and we stopped for drinks at this lovely village called Uki, where the school dated back to 1878, a real settler place. Back in Byron we enjoyed a swim on the beach and after dinner managed a walk into town for a drink admiring the stars and the moon overhead before collapsing into bed at 8.30pm!!

It is our last day in town today, my parents' Ruby wedding anniversary, so a day of chilling by the beach.

xx